Liantrius: The Last Meaningful Fight...

[V'icternus]

So, yeah, I got bored and made this.

Anyway, a little bit of backstory for my Avatar character, I suppose... more specifically, the quote in my sig...

Spoiler

Show

And part II

Spoiler

Show

And now, part III, with an art upgrade that you can thank Tiffanie Lirle for.

Spoiler

Show

Part IV, officially the most procrastinated thing I ever actually ended up finishing.

Spoiler

Show

Any comments, concerns, or queries, just post them here.

[Green-Shirt Q]

Well, I guess this is pretty good. The only thing that I can complain about is that the text is pretty slim, which makes it kinda ugly, and the characters are a little stiff, which isn't a huge problem.

Also, WILL EVERYBODY PLEASE STOP MAKING GENER-BENDING BELT JOKES?! IT WASN'T EVEN FUNNY WHEN ORDER OF THE STICK DID IT!

Lastly, I know this next comment is incredibly hypocritical, but making a backstory comic when you aren't in Avatar Battle Royale? Isn't that a little egotistical?

[BRC]

Well, I guess this is pretty good. The only thing that I can complain about is that the text is pretty slim, which makes it kinda ugly, and the characters are a little stiff, which isn't a huge problem.

Also, WILL EVERYBODY PLEASE STOP MAKING GENER-BENDING BELT JOKES?! IT WASN'T EVEN FUNNY WHEN ORDER OF THE STICK DID IT!

Lastly, I know this next comment is incredibly hypocritical, but making a backstory comic when you aren't in Avatar Battle Royale? Isn't that a little egotistical?

Actually, what's Egotistical is saying you need to be in ABR to give your character a backstory and make a comic about it.


I mean, what differentiates a Backstory comic from any other besides that, generally, with a Backstory comic the audience is expected to know, more or less, how it turns out in the end.

And I havn't actually seen many gender-belt jokes, so I'm not going to judge him for that.

The art could use a little work, and it's generally considered nice to spoiler large images, but otherwise I find nothing objectionable.

[Green-Shirt Q]

Actually, what's Egotistical is saying you need to be in ABR to give your character a backstory and make a comic about it.


I mean, what differentiates a Backstory comic from any other besides that, generally, with a Backstory comic the audience is expected to know, more or less, how it turns out in the end.

Well, the backstories kinda serve a purpose for ABR characters. It allows us to see the character in their own light, so that we will be able to interact with them in the actual comic more effectively. So that we might write for them, if at least for just a response to a question.

I don't really see the purpose of building a backstory if you aren't, or don't plan to be in, a collaberative comic. Or have already created several comics already and wish to show the character's motivation.

[BRC]

Well, the backstories kinda serve a purpose for ABR characters. It allows us to see the character in their own light, so that we will be able to interact with them in the actual comic more effectively. So that we might write for them, if at least for just a response to a question.

I don't really see the purpose of building a backstory if you aren't, or don't plan to be in, a collaberative comic. Or have already created several comics already and wish to show the character's motivation.

So, don't think of it as a back story, merely as a story.

[Green-Shirt Q]

So, don't think of it as a back story, merely as a story.

That might be difficult, now that it's been introduced as a backstory for the avatar.

I will try, but now I'll expect the main character to be a "Marty Stu" or at least to be the author. I am now unnecessarily cautious.

[Tiffanie Lirle]

I find the thread title ironic, seeing as we really have no idea as to what in the nine hells is going on here. As for the art, I expect to see some huge improvements after that pm convo of ours, V'ict.

You need to work on the expressions, and make the motions more fluid. Look at comic 2, the black haired guy has practically the same exact pose throughout the whole thing. That's just lazy.

You really should work on your panels as well, having them spaced so far apart is completely wasteful and unnecessary. (It's also pretty ugly.)

I would also suggest using a different font, comic sans seems to be the default font used in most of the comics around here. Also, you can see that some of the text is squished. Never stretch or shrink font with the speech bubbles.

You could also put a little more effort into detailing the background.

Edit - And for the readers sake, put all your comics into spoiler boxes in the first post.

[Bayar]

Well, the backstories kinda serve a purpose for ABR characters. It allows us to see the character in their own light, so that we will be able to interact with them in the actual comic more effectively. So that we might write for them, if at least for just a response to a question.

I don't really see the purpose of building a backstory if you aren't, or don't plan to be in, a collaberative comic. Or have already created several comics already and wish to show the character's motivation.

Jesus, you dont have to be in ABR to have a backstory for your avatar.

Someone could have an avatar and people wont know the story behind that avatar. Hence backstory.

[Green-Shirt Q]

Jesus, you dont have to be in ABR to have a backstory for your avatar.

Someone could have an avatar and people wont know the story behind that avatar. Hence backstory.

My name isn't Jesus. It's The Q. You should know this by now.

Anyway, as I was just saying, in my opinion I just don't see much of a point to a backstory unless you are a character of a comic. Otherwise, who cares?

I hate to be so blunt, but really, if we know who is avatar is, what do we do with that information? In ABR, it could help us interact with the character better. But, say, just at the forums? I just don't get it.

It's like handing out business cards and you don't have a job. It just makes little sense.

[V'icternus]

Hmm, well, to put to rest some concerns, ABR does sound interesting, so I may check it out, at the least...
So, you can see this as pre-backstory or something... (Really, I just got bored and stuck this here.)

As for the lazy artwork, I'm lazy. I'll be the first to admit that. But I'll try and get some more motion in there instead of leaving it all to your imagination.

Inkscapes text was being stupid, so I gave up (When something becomes more work and less fun, it's work, not play.)

And as for the GB belt joke, there's a lot more to it. Which I will probably show you all sometime... aren't you lucky? (He becomes practically identical to his sister. Which is rather disturbing for all involved... especially his sister.)

Now, with the setup of the panels, I'll try and rearange that so it's more natural. The reason there's so little detail in the current background is because they really are in the middle of a huge empty waste. In the late evening. It'll be night, soon, though, so more details will show up in the sky.

But I'm loving that people are reading it and commenting, so... yeah.

[V'icternus]

Part III now up. Includes an accidental Critical, some flashbacks, and it made me feel kind of weepy just drawing the thing...

[Tiffanie Lirle]

See, this would be an incredibly sad and heartfelt moment if anyone even cared about the guy. But since we don't know who he is, or his story, the entire moment is just sort of lost on the readers. A few flashback panels don't really accomplish much, but I can see what you were trying to do.

And as I said in the ABR thread, your art has improved insanely. I'm actually quite surprised that some basic tips helped improve your art this much.
[ego] But I suppose I'm just that awesome. [/ego]

Some criticism though, in panel 3, the katana has blood on it, yet it vanishes completely after that. In panel 9, the panel cuts into the top of the speech bubble. I also feel that you overused the bowed head/crying pose for green-robed guy.

I personally would have had him kneeling down next to white-cape guy in panel 7 and then getting back up at panel 9 or so. As it is he just ran there to stand next to him.

But those are just minor details, all in all you're doing good.

[V'icternus]

Oops, didn't notice the speech-bubble invasion there...

And yes, you are that awesome.

On another note, I may just have to go way back in time to back when these two were in a Party to give readers the full view of, well, everything... the character, what they're doing in this wasteland anyway, and why they are no longer in said Party.

I had actually planned another flashback to be in there, but I seem to have activiated my magical "forget about that thing you were just thinking about" power and instead finished the comic.

...Might have to do some more flashbacks in the next one... if there's room. Stuff's about to happen. Isn't that cool?

Oh, and with the Katana, that was just because putting the blood on there was much harder than it looks (there's probably an easy way that I just don't know yet... ). You'll also notice that Liantrius's chest wound closes up magically once it's no longer important.

I'm quite proud of how I managed to keep the characters and objects in the proper positions when related to the stars around them for so many panels...

And the original plan was to have him kneeling, but I felt it would be hard to do and wasn't confident in my ability to do it right just yet. And I wanted to be finished before I went to sleep, so I didn't bother taking hours to figure out how to make a good looking kneeling OotS style person. (Remember: Still lazy, even after awesomeness lessons. )

Thanks for the comments, they're half the reason I do art-stuff.

[V'icternus]

Alright! Alright! Here!

Spoiler

Show

Yes, it took about five months for that last row of panels.

So Vic, are you really that lazy?

Why yes, yes I am. But hey, at least I did the thing!

Hey Vic, why'd it take so long?

A lack of free time at midnight, which is when I generally do this kind of thing.

Why not just do it at another time? Or make time to get it done?

Because shut up.

So Vic, how long till the next one? Ten months? Two years?

I promise to try to get it out before the, uh...
Two month mark.
Yeah, that should leave time for procrastination, genuine lack of time and laziness.

Yo' Vic, did you know that extended conversations with yourself is a sign of mental instability?

Yes. Anything you know, I know.

Why are you still typing for me you?

I don't know. I'm bored or something.

So Vic, why did you wait till nobody in the world could possibly still care about this comic to finish it?

Hey, just because I stopped caring, doesn't mean I don't now.
For a while.
Probably.

I'm bored.

Me too.

Uh, try to enjoy, or something, I guess?

Or just go check out other, better webcomics that people actually care about.
That's cool too.

...'S what I'm gonna go do...

DLE is awesome...

Yeah...

...

...Suggestions, critique and comments welcome as always.

And yes, I am planning on this to become a larger, less... uh... boring, story that explains what's going on and whatnot, eventually leading up to and then proceeding past the scenes that I've shown you already.

...I'm gonna hit Submit Reply now...