Results 361 to 390 of 1498
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2018-01-21, 03:27 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2015
- Location
- An igloo near you
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
My completely awesome avatar (I call her Quill) has been generously crafted by the esteemed Honest Tiefling!
GENERATION 21: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig and add 1 to the generation. social experiment.
DEGENERATION 87: Copy this into your sig and subtract 1 from the degeneration when you first see it. This is an antisocial experiment.
Gosh, 2D8HP, you are so very correct (and also good-looking) and your humility is stunning.
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2018-01-21, 03:45 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
Last edited by S@tanicoaldo; 2018-01-21 at 03:45 PM.
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2018-01-21, 03:46 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
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2018-01-22, 12:45 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2009
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
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2018-01-22, 10:44 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2018
- Location
- Somewhere on the trail
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2018-01-22, 09:44 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Dec 2015
- Location
- An igloo near you
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
Last edited by AuthorGirl; 2018-01-22 at 09:45 PM. Reason: a word
My completely awesome avatar (I call her Quill) has been generously crafted by the esteemed Honest Tiefling!
GENERATION 21: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig and add 1 to the generation. social experiment.
DEGENERATION 87: Copy this into your sig and subtract 1 from the degeneration when you first see it. This is an antisocial experiment.
Gosh, 2D8HP, you are so very correct (and also good-looking) and your humility is stunning.
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2018-01-22, 09:47 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jul 2014
- Location
- Avatar By Astral Seal!
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
Just find a picture!
I have a LOT of Homebrew!
Spoiler: Former AvatarsSpoiler: Avatar (Not In Use) By Linkele
Spoiler: Individual Avatar Pics
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2018-01-22, 10:34 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2018
- Location
- Somewhere on the trail
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2018-01-23, 05:28 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Sep 2014
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
I was...going to write this big long thing in regards to these two quotes but I think I can sum them up fairly quickly.
Media doesn't own your sexuality. Media doesn't own your gender. You do.
You give media the power to influence and make yourself uncomfortable. If you want to enjoy Zelda or Donkey Kong or Mario...enjoy them for enjoyment. So what if Link's a dude or Donkey Kong is a giant poo flinging monkey. It's a game. Not only is it a game but it's a game not even making a statement on sex or gender or anything of that nature. Hell, Nintendo (since we're talking about Nintento games) is so scrubbed clean of anything that might passably be offensive to anyone ever that they've become a sad, stale parody of themselves so resistant and terrified of change that they crank out the same game by rote.
Link being a dude saying nothing about your gender, nothing about your sexuality, nothing about...anything about you. Even on a level of vain, petty escapism. They're so gender neutral as to be devoid of character whatsoever. Designed to be, in fact, so that anyone and everyone can slot in and be at home. But even if they weren't it doesn't matter. Marcus Fenix of Gears of War fame is as MAN as you get...but he's just a bunch of ones and zeroes. Marcus Fenix owns your sexuality and gender as much as the paint on the wall does and says about as much about it as whatever you're sitting on when you play it.
One could simply sum this all up as "stop cramming sex and slamming gender politics into a place that it neither belongs nor exists in in the first place" but that might be too...pithy. So I'll end (almost) on this note instead. Do what you enjoy. If playing Zelda is something you enjoy, keep on doing it and Link's non-existent genitals be damned. Him being a dude doesn't change the fact that you're a woman (or...whatever you're going with 137ben...honestly don't know)
Unless of course the only way for you to enjoy media is if it comports directly with your sexuality and ethics and gender and whatnot. If that's the case...whew...can't even willingly tread there.
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2018-01-23, 06:24 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2008
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
It does get easier over time I find; earlier on in my transition I found it harder to identify with male characters / had a bit of a repulsion-y thing going on cause I didn't want to invalidate myself / was worried it would / etc... but it's been better and it's been presenting less mental dissonance these days.
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2018-01-23, 08:04 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
LGBTitp
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2018-01-23, 12:09 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Sep 2013
- Location
- England
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
For whatever it's worth, you're not alone.
Spoiler: I don't know if this'll help, but...This may sound weird coming from a cis woman, but I actually really relate to a good bit of what you wrote.
I've always told others that I'm "a fan of the Zelda series", but across all of the games and all of the characters, it's always been Link who I've most related to, far more than any other character in the series. (Certainly way more than any iteration of Zelda! Or even girls who have gotten more dialogue, like Midna.) I've been playing the series since I was roughly five or six years old. When I was 11 and OoT came out, I was the first in line for the midnight release. I actually ordered Majora's Mask from Japan before it was released overseas (but didn't manage to find my way around the region lock before it released in America). I've dressed as Link for Halloween. I made a replica of the Master Sword. I got into archery (basically entirely because I was inspired by Link's example and wanted to be more like him). I learned how to write Hylian script (both OoT/MM Hylian and TP Hylian-- the latter in which I've written love letters to my now-husband, just in case I don't have enough geek cred yet ).
But more than that, I immersed myself in Link's stories. The adventures he's had, the trials he's overcome, the lives he's lived. And I made up my own unwritten stories interacting with various NPCs, too. It probably does sound a little crazy, but some of the things he went through (particularly in Majora's Mask) were philosophically analogous to things that I was going through in my own life... and by not just watching him handle those things-- but playing the game and being the one TO handle things, as him-- helped give me a path, a mindset to cope with some really tough stuff in my own life. I saw myself in him. His struggles were my struggles, and somehow through that connection, mine were also his. We were one and the same.
I feel like that kind of deep connection to a character is something that a lot of people struggle to understand. I remember back in high school, one of my cousins, upon learning how 'into Zelda' I was and how important Link was to me, made a sketch of Link hugging me with a little heart. I remember telling her that it was really cute, but it's not so much that I'm Link's "fan", or that I have a crush on him or something. I AM Link. And I remember her being baffled, and actually outright protesting to me, "but Link's a guy!" And so now, I'm going to tell you the same thing that I told her:
Link is a hero.
Link shouldn't be defined by his body any more than any of us should. He should be defined by who he is-- by his actions and his courage in the face of darkness. It doesn't matter if some (or at this moment, potentially all) iterations of Link that Nintendo has made were AMAB-- that's not the sum of his person. Maybe it's just been my own reading, but I've never gotten the feeling that being male is particularly important to Link himself. If you wrote a long list of descriptors about Link, "being AMAB" is pretty far down the list. Heck, for physical descriptors I feel like "being left handed" (usually) or "wearing green" (usually) is higher up the list than what he has under his tunic. I feel like if you were to ask a lot of people who Link is, they'd say something like "great swordsman" or "musically talented" or "versatile and a great problem-solver" or "always has time to help others"-- or simply, "he is a hero".
I identify with Link because he is Link. Now, we do have some other, slightly more superficial things in common-- I know how to use a bow and ride a horse, and I like to think I'm not a terrible musician either. But do I have everything in common with him? Heck no! I have dark hair, I'm not left-handed, I know very little about how to use a sword, and I'm very much a woman. But none of that matters. I identify with his character. I was ostracized for "not belonging" as a kid; I lost my parents; I'd take great risks and move heaven and earth to help those I love. I live my life courageously. The Spirit of the Hero is in me-- and it is in you, too.
So don't let a few voice clips and pronouns in other peoples' dialogue stand in the way of your special connection to something you love. Don't let it destroy your past happy memories, and don't let it take away all of the future possibilities you'll have. (And hey, if it helps, apparently actually four of Link's voice actors over the years have been female anyway (out of nine total at a quick glance).) It's not the first time other characters have been wrong about who someone is, anyway-- think about the masks Link wears in MM. He doesn't actually completely become Mikau or Darmani (or the Deku Butler's son)-- he is still Link, the hero, taking their forms and taking up their causes so he can heal their very souls. Maybe someday Nintendo will actually have the option for a girl avatar, which for the record I'd also really like-- but no matter what, Link and I will continue saving Hyrule and leading our courage to one another. We'll fight through the darkness together as one, just as we always have.
So if you identify with his valor, his determination, his humility, his resourcefulness, his desire to help others, or anything and everything else about him, don't let anyone or anything-- not even your own doubts-- hold you back. Speaking as a cis girl: Identifying with Link does not make you any less feminine or any more masculine. It makes you a person who has feelings, experiences, worldviews, and/or reactions similar to another. It makes you human.
Hugs (if you want them) from another "Link".Me: "Are you like, trying to destroy the world or something?"
DMPC: "...I'm eleven."
Me: *suspicious* "Is that a 'yes'?!"
―my current PTU campaign
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2018-01-23, 03:19 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
Thanks for the hugs. At the moment, I've been taking this as an example of my male side needing to express itself. As time goes on, I may end up getting more comfortable doing this as female, or so may find that only my male half is into it and thus only do it on my "boy days." Regardless it is good to know that it's fine for a girl to see herself that way too.
LGBTitp
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2018-01-23, 04:36 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jun 2017
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
This is a good attitude towards it.
It may mean even less from a cis male, but like Lettuce identifies with Link, many of the game and show characters I identify with most are female. Gender is, IMO, the least important factor for identifying with a character. Personality, backstory, talents, and actions all lead me to identify stronger with someone than looks or gender ever could.
Obviously it's easier for me to say that, as most protagonists are still male and representation is still very important to strive for, but it definitely is true for me. And gender may be more important for you, which is fine.
But just like you don't necessarily need to be a left-handed elf to identify with Link, hopefully you can learn to at least be comfortable with the character when your gender doesn't match as well, even if the identification isn't there on those days..
All the best!
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2018-01-24, 02:34 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
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2018-01-24, 10:10 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2018
- Location
- Somewhere on the trail
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
It helps tremendously when your idea of yourself match the reflection in the mirror. I am sorry that your blood relations can't see what they are missing out on, but I think being away from people who will tear you down because you don't fit their idea of you is another reason you can smile now.
Here's to many more reasons for you to smile and many more friends who accept you for you.
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2018-01-24, 11:17 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
Sigh.
I don't know how to handle this whole genderfluid thing. I try presenting female because I'm curious about being a girl, kind of like it, do it more and have fun with it, but every time I do it I start to build up this anxious undercurrent of "no, this isn't right..." usually tied to the male characters and roles I've historically identified with, which just keeps building until I can't handle it and I crash back to being male again. This lasts for a while until I get curious about being a girl again and the cycle just repeats itself.
How can I feel comfortable about being both genders, and how can I reassure both sides of myself that they won't be erased by the other? It just feels like I'm being blown around in a tornado right now.LGBTitp
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2018-01-25, 12:52 AM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jan 2018
- Location
- Somewhere on the trail
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
Sadly becoming comfortable as gender fluid takes both time, an excellent support network, and trail and error.
I spent most of my years in high school as “one of the guys.” I spent time working in a comic shop as the only women. I often had to put customers in their place for thinking girls aren't knowledgeable about comics. I sometimes wear a binder. I had to defend my identity to some people, but those who continued badgering me to choose a gender and what gender I liked, I eventual learned to drop from my life. That took time and a lot of sessions with my therapist.
I did a ton of my gender exploration through DnD and other tabletop RPGs. (My high school DnD group often mixed which pronouns I used with my characters' pronouns.) If a new gaming group I join gives me any shade about "not playing my gender," I dropped to find a group that was supportive. Thankfully most games I join now have at least one member of my support network.
Everyone is a little different. What I have done may help you or it may not. If you need someone to listen or a shoulder to lean on, feel free to PM me.
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2018-01-25, 07:37 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Jul 2006
- Location
- Eastern US
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
I agree with these two statements.
My favorite genre are RPGs. I have horrible new-class-itis in a lot of games where you can build your own PC. (I currently have 6 active playthroughs of Skyrim...) In every game where you can pick your PCs gender, I have a mix of male and female characters. I do it because when I set out to make a character, I figure out who the person is and how I see that person in my mind. Sometimes the person is male; sometimes female. (I admit, I have a habit of making my tough melee characters female.) The gender does not affect how I see or play the character. It's a character on a screen - the way I interact with the game world.
A few amusing updates from my life...
1) My parents moved to the southern US a few years ago, but still travel back to see the rest of the family for Christmas. This past Christmas, they realized they would pass very close to where I live now and wanted to meet me for dinner. I agreed, but then realized I would have to shave. I've worn facial hair for years, as I think I have a baby face when I am clean-shaven. But in the interest in family peace, off came the beard. But in good news, it grew back quickly!
2) I am a criminal defense attorney in a conservative city. Earlier this week, a client came to meet with me. Also with her was another woman and a pre-teen girl. The girl sat in the waiting room, and the two women came back to my office. I'm used to family members coming to client meetings, so having an extra person didn't make me think twice. When the second woman was not introduced with her relationship to my client (i.e. "this is my sister"), I began to suspect these two were married. (Their interactions with each other were also a clue.) A while into the meeting, my client mentions in passing that the other woman is her wife. I didn't say anything, just gave a quick nod and went on with the conversation. A few minutes later, my client said "I did mention that she is my wife, right?" I had my head down and was writing, so just said "yes, you did" without looking up.
In hindsight, I wonder if they were trying to gauge my reaction to knowing their relationship. Wanting to make sure I wasn't going to wig out on representing my client or something. (I'm court appointed. I can't wig out, even if I wanted to!)Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
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2018-01-26, 01:51 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2005
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
Where I live in Arizona is a HORRIBLE place to be gay or bi or whatever. Almost no where to go to meet.
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2018-01-26, 05:37 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
going to just cross post this from the questions thread:
Anyone else here agendered? Since I still present trans feminine and am on HRT I don't consider myself Non binary, does that make sense?
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2018-01-26, 05:54 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
I actually know some people who were AMAB, transitioned on HRT, and live full time as women, who also identify as nonbinary for different reasons. I also know a couple of trans masculine AFAB people who are the same way. I tend to use nonbinary as kind of an umbrella term that covers anyone who doesn't strictly identify as male or female, which could include things like agender and genderfluid.
ArlEammon: Arizona is hardly devoid of LGBT people; you just need to know where to look. Might want to check out Phoenix Pride around the beginning of April; there are all kinds of different LGBT organizations that show up for that and you might find something that suits you there. In the meantime I 'm part of a group of LGBT gamers here that might work for you; look up "Phoenix Gaymers" if you're interested.Last edited by Dire Moose; 2018-01-26 at 05:58 PM.
LGBTitp
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2018-01-26, 06:16 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
last 3 posters are from Arizona :O
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2018-01-26, 07:31 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
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2018-01-26, 09:04 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Aug 2009
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
Oops, looks like I'm breaking the Arizona trend!
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2018-01-26, 09:32 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
Re: LGBTAI+ #59: Will You Take This Woman To Be Your Galpal?
And ArlEammon thinks there aren't a lot of LGBT people in this state...
Speaking of which, there are two gay bars and a lesbian bar on 7th Avenue between Camelback and Bethany Home, plus a third gay bar on 19th and Bethany Home.
Is there something up with the water supply here?Last edited by Dire Moose; 2018-01-26 at 09:34 PM.
LGBTitp
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2018-01-26, 09:34 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
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2018-01-26, 09:35 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
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2018-01-26, 09:36 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Feb 2014
- Location
- Arizona
- Gender
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2018-01-26, 09:37 PM (ISO 8601)
- Join Date
- Mar 2009