Crack Pairings VII - Bring Bottled Water, Our Water is Spiked With Love Potion

[Water-Smurf]

Not that much has happened; a brief alignment discussion, one or two short fics, a few pictures. A lot of messing around...

Oh, yeah! I saw your picture. :) You did very well in capturing the outward appearance of their relationship--aesthetic and physical, but far from meaningful.

We don't really have in-depth discussions when you're not around to motivate us.

*chuckles softly* What can I say? I like talking/typing.

Lengthening the moon cycles. Brilliant. I'm glad that didn't get left unresolved, and that some of the gods are rational.

Prometheus is by far the most sympathetic deity towards humans. He was the one who made them, and he dealt with being chained to a rock to have his liver torn out by an eagle every day so humans could have fire. I figure that it would be in-character for him to be willing to deal with Aphrodite's wrath for a human's sake.

Is Mijung starting to be attracted to Yutrin? Maybe? Slightly? D'awww.

He's sweet, emotionally open, and he's being supportive while she's confused and frightened. She's already feeling a little attachment, and the sexual tension, especially with the hormones pregnancy gives, is going to mount.

At least it seems surviving won't be quite as difficult as they feared.

Let's not jump to conclusions, now.

Well my first choice would be V/Reddy, obviously. Although if you count V/Aandy as a couple...

Mijung/Yutrin promises to be fluffy enough as it is (the pairing itself, not the actual setting or story).

And I'm having trouble imagining how any of the other hinted or discussed couples such as Deirdre/Xykon could ever be fluffy.

Any ideas for any of those pairings for fluffiness? I'm not good with thinking up fluffy ideas.

V/Aandy! Or DeirdreZykon! Just cause it'd be funny to have fluff for it. XD

Any idea for fluff?


Maybe it would be good to make my Valentine's Day offer clearer: anyone can request a pairing, provided that I've written it, implied it, or had prolonged speculation about it before. That includes Belkar/Vaarsuvius, Redcloak/Vaarsuvius, Vaarsuvius/Xykon, Tiasal-Deirdre/Redcloak, Tiasal-Deirdre/Xykon, Tiasal-Deirdre/any member of her family, Tiasal-Deirdre/O-Chul, Mijung/Yutrin, Soon/Girard, Soon/Mijung, Vaarsuvius/Aarindarius, Red (Haley)/Patch (Right-Eye), Elf (Vaarsuvius)/Crim (Redcloak), and Tsukiko/Redcloak. Not all of these would exactly turn out to be fluffy, just by nature of the dynamic between them. (And if you can figure out any other eligible pairings, kudos.) If you ask for a pairing, I'd like it if you gave a prompt or an idea, simply because I'm still a little awkward with fluff and figuring it out.

I'll pick one or two of the requests and write them out. Have fun, and don't be scared to ask for anything.

[Lix Lorn]

Loved the picture!
The pairing was HadesPersephone. Not very crack. I forgot. XD

Hmm. Well, Xykon can act friendly. Maybe he's like, teaching her something?
Teaching her meteor swarm, and they end up kissing? That'd be pretty fluffy. For them.

[Draconi Redfir]

pssh. V/reddy has been done too much.

how about some Thoq x Mrscruffy or Thoq x belkars riding dog? :D

[icastflare!]

pssh. V/reddy has been done too much.

BlASPEMY!!!!!

[Sereg]

Indeed. There is no such thing as too much V/Reddy. Nor is there such a thing as too much V/Inkyrius, V/Aarindarius, Z/Haley, V/Elan, V/Durkon, V/Roy, V/Celia, V/Miko, V/Tsukiko, V....okay, you get the picture.

I have enjoyed the fics that have gone up so far.

Also, I checked and I was wrong, something-weres have no relationship to the moon at all.

[Draconi Redfir]

Indeed. There is no such thing as too much V/Reddy. Nor is there such a thing as too much V/Inkyrius, V/Aarindarius, Z/Haley, V/Elan, V/Durkon, V/Roy, V/Celia, V/Miko, V/Tsukiko, V....okay, you get the picture.

I have enjoyed the fics that have gone up so far.

Also, I checked and I was wrong, something-weres have no relationship to the moon at all.

ok thats it. i offically want a male V/femaleV :P V/V FTW!

[Sereg]

ok thats it. i offically want a male V/femaleV :P V/V FTW!

Been done. It's as awesome as it sounds. I also seen that I have a typo in my last post. It's supposed to say "V/Haley", but it says "Z/Haley" (of course, that is also fun).

[Zanaril]

Oh, yeah! I saw your picture. :) You did very well in capturing the outward appearance of their relationship--aesthetic and physical, but far from meaningful.

Thanks.

Let's not jump to conclusions, now.

I should have guessed.

Any ideas for any of those pairings for fluffiness? I'm not good with thinking up fluffy ideas.

V and Aandy are on an outing somewhere and someone mistakes them for a couple rather than teacher/apprentice. Vaarsuvius encourages the notion.

Aarindarius is not amused. But for whatever reason, he has to play along.

I'll pick one or two of the requests and write them out. Have fun, and don't be scared to ask for anything.

Vaarsuvius/Xykon then. Becase you can't tell me it wouldn't be just slightly amusing seeing Xykon flirting with her.

ok thats it. i offically want a male V/femaleV :P V/V FTW!

How about Male!V/Female!V/Haley?

Loved the picture!
The pairing was HadesPersephone. Not very crack. I forgot. XD

Actually, I think it's proof that the idea of crack pairings is older than dirt.

[half-halfling]

I felt guilty about not doing anything for Valentines Day, so here's a short ficlet.

Spoiler

Show

Aarindarius first realised something was up when he opened his eyes to find a bunch of freshly cut flowers on his pillow. That was the first clue.

The blooms were small and pale, a species which he knew to grow in the woods around the area, although few would be blossoming this early in the year. Whoever had found and cut them must have taken a lot of effort. He sat there pondering the flowers for a while, before getting up to find some water for them.

It was Vaarsuvius of course. No-one else would have been able to sneak into his room – let alone his tower - not if their intent was as harmless as leaving a gift. His apprentice had been acting oddly recently. First there had been the increasing amount of time spent away from the tower – well, that was to be expected, and if anything he was glad the elf was interacting with other people. But then when the younger elf was to be found, she always seemed distracted. Mind elsewhere. Staring into space.

He could have sworn she had kept staring at him, too. It was unnerving to look up from the book one was reading, only to see your apprentice blush and look away. His concerns were briefly laid to rest (and a whole new set of concerns acquired) when he found out that Vaarsuvius had started seeing an adolescent from the village. Soon after, the staring had stopped much to his relief.

And now the flowers.

Maybe he was simply looking into it too much. They weren’t as communicative as they had been; when once Vaarsuvius had followed him around all day hanging onto his every word, he now was lucky to see her at all except when she approached him to ask help with a particularly tricky spell or translation, and even that was becoming less and less frequent. While it saddened him that they were drifting apart, he let her have her distance. She was just growing up.

So maybe this was a peace offering of sorts?

He carried the small bouquet down to the kitchen, where he took a tall cut glass and half filled it. He trimmed the stems with a knife then placed them in the water.

He put the glass on the table.

He sat down, and for some time he just gazed at the flowers, thinking.

There was a small noise behind him. He spun around and was just quick enough to catch a glimpse of purple hair snatching out of sight. With a sigh, he turned back to the glass. The other thought he had was pushed away, out of sight and out of mind.

The next morning, he could smell the fresh flowers before he even looked.

For the next three days, each morning there were flowers.

On the fourth day, he opened his eyes to see purple hair. That was the second clue. There was a brief moment where his trance-addled mind flailed wildly, but he quickly assured himself that his apprentice certainly hadn’t been there when he had gone to bed. However there was still the matter that the younger elf was certainly there now, and that she was pressed up against his side with one arm wrapped around his waist. Thankfully they were both clothed.

“Vaarsuvius.”

The name was said more sharply than he had intended, and the arm was rapidly withdrawn as the elf in question sat up, looking very guilty. Aarindarius squirmed away from her and also sat up, raising an eyebrow.

“…I had a bad trance memory?”

Aarindarius paused. When she had first been apprenticed to him and the tower become her permanent residence, there had been several occasions she had found him in the middle of the night for that same reason – usually in his study, but once of twice in his room. In both cases, he would have read something to her, and once her eyes where starting to droop shut he would have carried her back to her room and tucked her into her own bed. True, in those times when she drew him from his trancing, she would cuddle against him under the blankets while he read, but never had she stayed there the whole night.

She had not done that for years. He didn’t think this was the case now, and as if to confirm it the smell of those flowers reached his nose. He spotted today’s offering on the opposite bedside table, delicate lilac petals this time. They had almost certainly been picked less than half an hour ago.

He gave the flowers a purposeful look, and then glanced back to his apprentice. A second later Vaarsuvius was off of the bed and out of the door.

With a sigh, Aarindarius got up and headed down the stairs to follow her.

He found her in the kitchen, leaning against the counter and staring at the wall, her face flushed bright pink. He noticed that her shoulders tensed slightly as he entered the room.

“Vaarsuvius, I’m not angry with you.”

The shoulders relaxed. Slightly.

With a sigh, Aarindarius went and stood next to her, taking up a similar pose. Vaarsuvius fidgeted.

“I thought you were in a relationship with someone… Inkyrius, wasn’t it?”

“We- I was. I broke up with Kyrie. We had an argument.”

Aarindarius sighed, and put an arm around her shoulders. “When?”

Vaarusvius hesitated a moment, then mumbled “…a week ago.”

She raised a hand to her face, and vigorously rubbed her eyes. It was rare for her to cry, and she wasn’t going to let it go on this time. Aarindarius tightened the one armed hug. “It’s alright to be upset.” There was no reply “You know I’ll always be here to listen if you need someone to talk to? I appreciate the flowers, but you don’t need to-“

Vaarsuvius kissed the corner of his mouth quite purposefully.

She tried to kiss him again - possibly fully on the lips - but the older wizard would never know because before she could do so he stepped away, leaving a gap between them. Vaarsuvius stared for a moment, and then burst into tears.

“You hate me!”

Alarmed, Aarindarius stepped forward and hugged her again, wrapping his arms around her shaking shoulders.

She buried her face in his chest. “I love you, but you hate me!”

“Shhh.”

He stood there, hugging her until the sobbing quieted down, but still not letting go. “I don’t hate you. I love you Vaarsuvius, but not in the way you think you want me to.”

“I do love you! I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you! I don’t need anyone else!” She tried to kiss him again, but once more he held her at arms length.

“I’m your teacher, your mentor and your friend, Vaarsuvius. But I can’t be your lover. You know that too, you’re just upset and you need someone to sympathise with you.”

Vaarsuvius stared mutely at him. “I still love him.” She whispered finally, and began to talk.

It was a month later that Vaarsuvius and Inkyrius were back on talking terms, and a year before they were going out again. It was another ten years later that they married.

Aarindarius watched and was happy for her, but he had lied. He could have loved her and have been in love with her; it was Vaarsuvius who had never really wanted that. And so, for her sake, he had to let her go.

I scrounged it up quickly, so it's probably not that good.

It was supposed to be cute, but then somehow wrote itself into being a bit depressing. And V probably isn't in character.

If You think it was bad, I'd like to see a good one . I liked it very much.

Water-smurf : If You're taking requests I'd like Redcloack x Tsukiko (possibly not-undead Redcloack ). And story was as always great.

[CoffeeIncluded]

So, guess who had 10 minutes of free time on her dad's computer this morning?

...And I didn't even know I had the books! Give them back.

Nice stories everyone. And yes, Water-smurf, my inbox and ears are open. I'm here to give what help I can. (Though I'm not sure if I'll be able to get on again before Wednesday.)

[Lix Lorn]

Well, i have changed my mind. I used to be a firm member of the V Is A Girl camp. Now i prefer the TwoVs one. Hehe Vaarsuvii.

Awww... (Sad face, gives back books)

....heheh. You're right. HadesPersephone IS a crack pairing. Underworld and the daughter of the Plant/Fertility goddess. Summer goddess? Demeter anyway.
It's just a CANON crack pairing. XD

[Reynard]

Any more crack picture requests?

[Closak]

How about an ABD/Nale picture?

ABD=Ancient Black Dragon (In case you didn't already know)

[Lix Lorn]

I read PotG. Love.

[Water-Smurf]

Vaarsuvius/Xykon then. Becase you can't tell me it wouldn't be just slightly amusing seeing Xykon flirting with her.

How would he flirt with her? I don't really know how to consciously write that. (Flirting confuses me. :< )

Actually, I think it's proof that the idea of crack pairings is older than dirt.

Really? I don't really see it as crack. Crack if Persephone fell in love with Hades and ran off with her, but not since Hades fell in love with her and pulled her into the underworld. I mean, it makes sense. He was cold and lonely and Persephone was the goddess of spring. I don't think Persephone is too happy with the arrangement, at any rate.

That being said, I saw the Lightning Thief movie. I spazzed out so hard over the inaccuracies that I fell on the ground and someone needed to restrict my breathing. I didn't like it.

Water-smurf : If You're taking requests I'd like Redcloack x Tsukiko (possibly not-undead Redcloack ).

Any ideas/preferences for how it plays out?

Nice stories everyone. And yes, Water-smurf, my inbox and ears are open. I'm here to give what help I can. (Though I'm not sure if I'll be able to get on again before Wednesday.)

*crawls to Coffee* *hugs*

[Asta Kask]

How would he flirt with her? I don't really know how to consciously write that. (Flirting confuses me. :< )

Prof. Richard Wiseman conducted a study about the best pick-up line.

speed dating study reveals science of seduction

Preliminary results from the first large-scale speed dating experiment have shown that women make up their minds about potential partners much faster than men, and revealed the best type of chat-up lines.

The study, conducted on Sunday 9th April 2006 by Professor Richard Wiseman (University of Hertfordshire) at the Edinburgh International Science Festival, involved 100 members of the public taking part in five-hundred 'speed dates'.

During the event, participants rated the attractiveness of their dates and indicated whether they would like to meet that person again.

Initial results revealed that in about a third of the dates, participants reached decisions about their potential mates in less than thirty seconds. Perhaps surprisingly, women proved especially likely to make such snap decisions, with 45% of women's decisions being made under thirty seconds, compared to just 22% of men's decisions.

"Men are often accused of being shallow and judging women very quickly - however, this evidence suggests that women may make up their minds much quicker than men", commented Wiseman. "It suggests men have only a few seconds to impress a woman, thus emphasising the importance of their opening comments".

Overall 60% of participants met someone with whom there was a mutual interest in seeing each other again.

Women were twice as 'picky' as men, and the top rated man and woman of the evening had a 100% success rate, with all of their dates wanting to meet them again.

To uncover the best type of chat-up lines, researchers compared the conversations of participants rated as 'very desirable' by their dates with those seen as 'especially undesirable'. Those 'highly skilled in seduction' encouraged their dates to talk about themselves in an unusual, quirky, way.

The most memorable lines from the top-rated man and woman in the study illustrate the point:

The top-rated male's best line was: 'If you were on Stars In Their Eyes, who would you be?', whilst the top-rated female asked: 'What's your favourite pizza topping?'.

In contrast, failed 'Casanovas' tended to be far less creative, employing old chestnuts like 'Do you come here often?' or struggling to impress with comments such as 'I have a PhD in computing'.

To identify the best topic of conversation for those in search of their perfect partner, participants were also asked to chat about different topics during the event. When talking about movies, less than 9% of the pairs wanted to meet up again, compared to 18% when participants spoke about the top topic - travel.

A clue as to why would-be lovers might want to avoid chatting about movies comes from additional questionnaire data from the study, showing that men and women have very different tastes in movies. For example, 49% of men liked action films compared to just 18% of women, whilst 29% of women liked musicals compared to only 4% of men.

"Whenever our couples spoke about films they really increased their chance of disagreement", commented Wiseman. "In contrast, conversations about travel tend to revolve around great holidays and dream destinations, and that makes people feel good and so appear more attractive to one another".

A second study demonstrated the age-old difficulty in predicting successful dating and matchmaking partnerships, (an interesting juxtaposition to the 'wisdom of crowds' principle, should anyone be considering applying it to dating services): over four-hundred people participated in an online experiment in which they studied photographs and descriptions of four women, and one man who dated each of the women. The four-hundred respondents attempted to predict the women he would find most attractive, but even the group who considered themselves 'especially skilled at matchmaking' failed to predict his choice correctly.

(With grateful acknowledgements to Professor R Wiseman.)



Professor Richard Wiseman (University of Hertfordshire) has published over forty academic papers into unusual areas of psychology, including deception, luck and the paranormal. Wiseman frequently appears on the media and has written The Luck Factor - a best selling book exploring the lives and minds of lucky and unlucky people. More info at: www.richardwiseman.com. The study was run in collaboration with Dr James Houran, an American expert on the psychology of compatibility with Online Dating Magazine. More info at: www.onlinedatingmagazine.com.

Science!!!

You need something to create a shared environment, that both can laugh at. Warlocks or incarnum users spring to mind.

*crawls to Coffee* *hugs*

*hugs*

You know, you'd get more worried PMs from me if you emptied your PM box once in a while...

[Lix Lorn]

If you need hugs i'm always happy to give them. (nodnod)
Huh. 4 Sciense! (Shot)

[Eztheria]

I votes for Andy/V during a sudden, completely random heavy downpour and V just knocks at Andys tower door somewhen in the late evening completely soaked and/or frozen. I hopes this has not been written before...

[Zanaril]

I votes for Andy/V during a sudden, completely random heavy downpour and V just knocks at Andys tower door somewhen in the late evening completely soaked and/or frozen. I hopes this has not been written before...

And you know what the best way to warm people up is.




...Hugs!

How would he flirt with her? I don't really know how to consciously write that. (Flirting confuses me. :< )

If he can somehow complement her on her arcane prowess without being obviously sarcastic, then he's all set to go.

[Eztheria]

And you know what the best way to warm people up is.




...Hugs!

Exactly! *glomps Zanaril*

[Asta Kask]

And you know what the best way to warm people up is.

Set fire to their clothes?

[Zanaril]

Set fire to their clothes?

Hopefully after they've been taken off.

[Water-Smurf]

You need something to create a shared environment, that both can laugh at. Warlocks or incarnum users spring to mind.

What's an incarnum user?

*hugs*

You know, you'd get more worried PMs from me if you emptied your PM box once in a while...

Oh, right. I should do that.

Now it's done.

I votes for Andy/V during a sudden, completely random heavy downpour and V just knocks at Andys tower door somewhen in the late evening completely soaked and/or frozen. I hopes this has not been written before...

I think that that's already been written. I think Meg did it.


I think I may have asked this question before, but I can't find it, so I'll ask again. Does anyone have any ideas to help me portray Right-Eye's and Tiasal's relationship? It's a complex thing they have going there. On Right-Eye's end, he's using her and he's more than a little disgusted by her heritage, but he still loves her, though he's unsure. On Tiasal's end, she's aware of all this and she's bitter. I feel that I should give them more screen time but I'm having issues bringing this idea across.

[Eztheria]

I think that that's already been written. I think Meg did it.

Nutsnberries. But it was a mighty fine story by Meg, thanks for reminding me.
Though the scene I thought of was in a sorta AU where V and Kyrie married much later and while V was...of age feminine, not married yet.

[Zanaril]

Nutsnberries. But it was a mighty fine story by Meg, thanks for reminding me.
Though the scene I thought of was in a sorta AU where V and Kyrie married much later and while V was...of age feminine, not married yet.

Hmmm... has 'snowed in' been used yet?

[Asta Kask]

What's an incarnum user?

An underwhelming magic-user sort from a splatbook. I don't know much about them, but some research in the Gaming Forum should tell you more. They could talk about bards, I guess.

Oh, right. I should do that.

Now it's done.

Yay! Commence spamming...

Sorry, I'm drawing a blank on RC and Tiasal.

[Draconi Redfir]

Really? I don't really see it as crack. Crack if Persephone fell in love with Hades and ran off with her, but not since Hades fell in love with her and pulled her into the underworld. I mean, it makes sense. He was cold and lonely and Persephone was the goddess of spring. I don't think Persephone is too happy with the arrangement, at any rate.

According to the "myth-o-mania!" books (written by Hades himself) what ACTUALLY happened was that Persephone had set the whole thing up, and hired cupid to shoot Hades with a three-day love dart. The two proceeded to date for a while, and aroused suspicion with the other gods.

Needless to say after many laughs, and an actual cord order, Hades realised what had happened, realised the three days have long since passed, and that all those feelings he had for Persephone were indeed his own.

So he jumped up, got on his knees, and in front of all the other gods shouted "PERSEPHONE I LOVE YOU!!!!"

And so for three-to-nine months of every year, p-phone (as Hades likes to call her) goes down to the underworld. And Demeter, horribly saddened by her leaving, goes off to Honolulu. "It will never be winter there"

[Lix Lorn]

I had an idea for a crack XykonElan. Possibly with genderswapping. Entitled 'Xykon's Secret'.

Hehe. AWESOME alternate mythology.

Well... If Tiasal gave Righy Eye a chance, then she could sense motive-and realise that though he's using her, he does care.
That helpful?

[Taekwondodo]

Well, i have changed my mind. I used to be a firm member of the V Is A Girl camp. Now i prefer the TwoVs one. Hehe Vaarsuvii.

Really? I'm in the "V is whatever I feel like at the moment" camp. I'm happy with V being female in V/Reddy but I wrote him/her as male, go figure!

*Claps* Yay, new PotG!!

On an unrelated note I went to see Valentines Day today. Very funny and plenty of "D'awwwww" moments. Apart for the 12 year old fan-girls of Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner. Grrrr...

[Water-Smurf]

I'm trying to sketch out ideas for the different requests to see which I'm going to write, but I've run into a few blocks and I may need a little nudging at this point.

First of all, which of you guys want this to stay fluffy? Many if not all of the pairings that have been requested since I posted my clarification promises to be gritty, depressing, and/or bitter, simply by virtue of the dynamic between the characters in the relationship.

Second of all, try to throw some scenarios down my way. I may or may not use them, but they help get the ideas flowing, and when it comes to fluff, I need plenty of ideas to use.