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Thread: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
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2011-04-20, 10:41 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Last edited by unosarta; 2011-04-20 at 10:41 PM.
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2011-04-20, 10:45 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
I think coming out is almost always awkward. Although I could see some potential problems with coming out in the car.
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2011-04-20, 10:49 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Yeah, I'm not very good at this, sorry.
Especially not if they're the type to ever have joked about figuring out how to shear off the passenger side or back of the car....
Or would get shocked at all, since taking one's eyes off the road at the wrong time could lead to a collision...
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2011-04-20, 10:52 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
No problem. You are better than most of my friends who are like "here, let me take a moment from making out with my SO to pay attention to your question?"
Fortunately, I timed it pretty well, so we were only a few blocks from school. Unfortunately, I didn't time it well enough, and there were a few minutes of awkward silence.
Life Rule #1: Don't come out in a car. You don't have anywhere to run.
... or so my friend has told me. >_>
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2011-04-20, 10:52 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
So... other than car-induced awkwardness, everything go okay?
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2011-04-20, 10:57 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
I don't know... I think so? Like, it was mostly because she thinks that me and my really close friend are going out (even though said friend already has a boyfriend, even thought I have told my sister this before), and it has become annoying.
However, I haven't actually talked to her about it, so I don't really know about her reaction. *shrug*
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2011-04-20, 11:50 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
I know the feeling pretty well, actually. I had a boyfriend for two months last year. He was my first real boyfriend. I ended things when it became apparent that he had baggage he needed to resolve, among other COMPLETELY CRAZY THINGS.
Since then, I've been feeling like the only gay person in New Orleans, which is kind of like saying you feel like the only priest in the Vatican.
I mean, I've met a few more gay people lately. A nice cantor at a local synagogue, a sweet local actor, and some cool folks at the LGBT community center. No one for romancin' though. Although, heh... we just hired a new chair of the history department and he looks like the love child of Jake Shears and Del Marquis, which is to say the Gorgeous Prince of all things Scissor Sisters. I met him last friday (Day of Silence!) and the first thing to run through my head was "Why do you have a partner, and why am I sixteen?"
So yeah, it feels pretty desolate out yonder. I know... 2 gay guys at a different school, a bunch more out of state, one bi-curious guy, and a few bisexual girls. Seeing as I don't swing both ways, my lady friends are of no assistance. The TWO count'em TWO gay guys I know at another school are either in relationships or uninterested. Hm... Must pursue this further... Because, come to think of it, one of those guys is single and we are both obsessed with Glee, GaGa, and Theater (I know, I know, just helping the stereotypes.) so maybe there's hope yet.
How fair you other LGBTAitp's and straight allies?Avatar by Dihan
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2011-04-21, 12:41 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
We don't even have a local gay bar. I thought everyone was supposed to have a local gay bar. Not us. Apparently there was one, but it closed down a couple years before I would have been of drinking age. Not that I drink.
The only LGBT people I know in the area are lesbians. I know... a lot of lesbians. A lot. I seem to attract them to me, like some sort of lesbian magnet. Of my major female friend population, less than 30% have been straight. Needless to say, this not only doesn't help my romance prospects but reduces the pool proportionally. My weird past relationship thing notwithstanding.
I like to joke sometimes that I can turn anyone off men just by greeting them.
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2011-04-21, 04:34 AM (ISO 8601)
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2011-04-21, 05:15 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Well, you have friends. That's always a plus.
Personally I'd hug my friends regardless of their relationship status but I am horrible at making friends.
Doesn't help that I am the only person in class who know what the word anime means.
Or extraterrestrial for that matter.Treasured Quotes
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2011-04-21, 07:42 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Our situations sound very similar, barring the fact that you have actually been in a relationship.
I think that is the worst part, when you are trying to help a friend out of whatever deep, deep hole they have dug themselves into, and they completely disregard anything you say by saying "What do you know? You haven't even had a boyfriend."
It is very, very frustrating.
Also; is it weird that of Glee, GaGa, and theatre, I only like GaGa, and only sometimes? I mean, every single one of my friends (literally; I can think of maybe two people who aren't) are in theatre, but I don't do it. A large portion of my friends are into Glee, but I dislike it (and I have fencing on the time that it is on, so I can't see it anyway). GaGa is fine in small doses, but she tends to be very dissimilar to most of my musical tastes.
Thanks!
I guess no one really checked it, or if they did, they just automatically corrected the URL.
That isn't really much of a consolation when they are always with their boyfriends, talking about their boyfriends, commenting on how similar people are to their boyfriends, talking about what they did with their boyfriends last week, etc etc.
It is less the emotional intimacy that I want, but like physical intimacy, and I can't really find that with my friends, at all. I have tried, and it just doesn't really work.
O_o
Really? Only you?
Maybe their lexicons are just strangely small...
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2011-04-21, 11:26 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Yeah, as someone who is extremely close to aromantic (which is a pain to tell people. "You're a romantic? You don't seem like it.."), and has never been in a relationship, I feel ya. Some things in relationships are plainly obvious even if you haven't ever been in one.
No, it isn't. Glee irritates me, and I'm not a fan of acting, even though I enjoy lots of other performance arts. If you're thinking that it's weird since the stereotype is that gay men love all those things, don't worry about it. Almost every gay man I know is not like that at all.Last edited by Nix Nihila; 2011-04-21 at 11:40 AM.
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2011-04-21, 12:27 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Re: Glee, Gaga, and theater:
I'm not sure what a Glee is. I think maybe they sing, yes?
I like some of Gaga's stuff, but not all of it. She's crazy, but seems very nice.
I only like theater if I get to work backstage. I did this in high school and it was fun. I got my very own spotlight to operate! Being up in the spot booth also meant I wasn't around to be yelled at by the director(s). Have you noticed that theater directors like to yell a lot?
Reading more signs at health services: Apparently, LGBT folk are more likely to be smokers? I hadn't heard that before.
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2011-04-21, 12:44 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Sadly, almost every gay guy I know is like that, with one exception (2 if you count myself). It's a bit irritating sometimes, but I find myself confused on why I'm even mad at people who do follow all the stereotypes. I mean, it's not like it's a negative or harmful.
Maybe I'm just irritated at everyone else for assuming I'm the same There's this girl who refuses to believe I'm gay because of my strong dislike of Glee and ambivalence toward theater.
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2011-04-21, 01:06 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
How can you hate acting but enjoy other performance arts when acting ties back into so many of them?
That goes beyond gay stereotypes because it's supposed to be ubiquitous in this culture that all people enjoy at least some television shows and movies.
But you're saying that the majority of gay men you know can't enjoy movies, television, and stage productions? That's... That's just so alien to me I can't even see a possible reason for it.
Whats the big problem with it?
Why is it sad that anyone enjoys watching movies, television, or going to see live theatre? The majority of all people that I know enjoy all three quite freely and aren't annoying about it for the most part, though there is the occasional bout of fanboyism or fangirlism, with the rest at least enjoying the first pair and with a not insignificant minority of that minority enjoying the last one as well but only willing to indulge in that way when going with company to see such a show.
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2011-04-21, 01:34 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
There isn't. It's just annoying when a good chunk of people assume:
If you are gay, then you must enjoy X. If not, then you enjoy Y. Y and X have very little overlap.
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2011-04-21, 01:37 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Oh, I don't hate acting, I just don't like doing pure acting. I don't enjoy being in a play, for example, but I do enjoy Juggling, Mentalism (which does require a heavy dose of acting), Close-up magic, Dance, and performing with the piano.
Alright, I suppose I phrased things a little strangely in my previous post. I was attempting to say that the percentage of gay men I know who are into glee is about the same as the percentage of straight men I know who are into glee.
Um... What? Where did I say that?Last edited by Nix Nihila; 2011-04-21 at 01:38 PM.
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2011-04-21, 01:48 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Oh, ok. I was starting to think I was missing something with how surreal what I was saying started getting. x.x Sorry about that. I can definitely understand how it's not your cup of tea to do though, since it's really a minority that have a zest for actually being on stage.
It seemed like you were saying that the gay men you knew also didn't enjoy acting as entertainment source when you said the gay men you knew didn't like such things after your previous phrasing had seemed to indicate you disliked acting as a form of entertainment rather than an activity to do yourself. x,x
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2011-04-21, 01:56 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Man, your friends have small reference pools. Try challenging them to a duel of Trivial Pursuit.
Hmm, physical intimacy? Does that mean I can hug you if Ilocatejust randomly bump into you? :3
I can't say for certain, at least one do know what a manga is, but a good deal had no idea what Dragonball or Yu-Gi-Oh were and only vaguely knew what Pokémon was when I tried to explain Anime to them.
I hope it's just a vocabulary thing, but when fifteen-year-olds couldn't understand what a footsoldier was I fear for our future.
I think they mean taking part in acting themselves, or stage-acting possibly.
Personally I do think the idea that being LGBT+ means enjoying Glee or Lady Gaga is a harmful one, if only because some people assume that if you fit their stereotypes then you are LGBT+ and if you donřt then you are not no matter what you say.
But then again, some people assume I like liquorice.
EDIT: Gah! Power Ranger'ed!Last edited by Mina Kobold; 2011-04-21 at 03:44 PM.
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2011-04-21, 02:08 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Coidzor, not to be a negative nellie but you've been jumping to whole rafts of conclusions lately. Is something up?
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2011-04-21, 03:02 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
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2011-04-21, 03:07 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
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2011-04-21, 03:07 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Well, I have started a new job lately, so maybe that's having an effect on my psyche...
By the by, I can't recall if I first saw it mentioned on gitp or not, but... have you heard that someone is doing an abridged webcomic of My Immortal over on drunkduck?
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2011-04-21, 04:09 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
I said I did fear, partly because of said unability of my former classmates to undertsand the word 'footsoldiers' (Or 'fodfolk' as it was in Danish) and partly because I've encountered worse.
I do not wish to read My Immortal just yet, although it would be an excellent excuse to declare humanity doomed and go Goth for a few months.Treasured Quotes
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2011-04-21, 04:27 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Wow, that sounds kind of annoying. D:
And I normally wouldn't even care if they didn't even follow my advice, but it's the fact that they don't even try to listen to me that really frustrates me.
I don't enjoy doing performance arts at all.
Glee is short for Glee Club, which is sort of like a Show Choir club, in a way. So, yes, they sing.
I respect Lady GaGa mostly because of the stories I have heard of what she does on tour. One of the coordinators/helpers of Q-Quest Youth Fest (which was a month or two ago) in Minneapolis, who also runs a local music label told
us about what she does. In Minneapolis, when she came here, she gave some local LGBT youth shelters like 150 tickets, and made them pay to get the kids to the concert. The tickets were in really good spots, and she just GAVE THEM AWAY. I literally almost cried, it was so sweet. Also, previously mentioned Dannielle Owens-Reid works for her, and honestly, I can respect anyone who gets Dannielle to work with them and love her job that much.
I didn't really know that there was a correlation between being LGBT and smoking. Have the people who conducted the study given any reasons for as to why this might be?
That is true, honestly. I don't have a problem with people who are in line with the stereotypes (and I have some really close friends who act like that).
Okay, someone refusing to believe you about something like that is just being a dumby head (for lack of a forum appropriate term). Seriously, a single TV show and a department of your school should not be defining your sexuality. >_>
A duel of Trivial Pursuit? What?
Of course! But, what I meant was more long term than that, I guess. I don't really know. *sigh*
That is kind of strange, but also understandable. I mean, Japanese culture hasn't spread necessarily that far, or far enough that everyone would know about it.
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2011-04-21, 04:35 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
This very tentative hypothesis is growing in me about glee clubs. It was a catch-all phrase during early 20th century college days for student groups that did extracurricular singing, music, and theatre activities, and I wonder if they acted as a kind of LGBT haven before such matters came to the surface.
My body of research for an LGBT historical fiction novel set in a fairly small college waxes; I plan to use the above speculation. There's a healthy proportion of drag in the old photographs I've looked at and... well... the guys involved tend towards the cute and squirrelly.
Plus, the stereotypes about (in particular) gay men involved in theatre and music have got to come from somewhere.
@Lix & Coizor -- those are the nicest two things anybody has said about me before.Last edited by Kneenibble; 2011-04-21 at 04:40 PM.
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2011-04-21, 09:49 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Maybe it's just that I haven't watched enough of it, but Glee annoys me specifically from an LGBT point of view. That gay kid is so... so very gay. He seems like a great big ol' stereotype. One of the two episodes I sat down and watched was about the (straight) guy he has a crush on moving in with him and his dad. What's the first thing he does? He smothers the poor kid's bedroom in lace and throw pillows. I don't get it, is he autistic or something? Does he not understand that other people don't like that sort of thing? He's meant to be his friend, how could he expect him to appreciate that? I know the friend got pretty nasty, but I didn't really blame him for freaking out.
Now, what I do like is that gay kid's dad. In both of the episodes I saw he got a long, heartfelt speech. I haven't even watched much of it, but his reaction when his son came out to him was just... 83
So, what is it? I've heard that he's "such a good gay character", but he seems so stereotypical to me, and a bit of an oblivious spoiled brat.The Iron Avatarist Hall of Fame!
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2011-04-21, 10:26 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Oh my god, no, believe me, that is my exact same reaction.
Also; he has a loving family, a loving community, honestly some pretty freaking awesome friends, but he for some reason feels the need to make out with a woman, because that totally convinces people that his completely stereotypically effeminately gay actions are not tied to his sexuality. And this is a high school. Right...
Honestly, a lot about the character bugs me right now, and I don't really like any of the other plot-lines (EXCEPT FOR THE LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP, HOLY****INGCRAP THAT WAS AMAZINGLY SWEET/TRUE TO THE CHARACTERS, OH MY GOD IT WAS BEAUTIFULLY DIRECTED/HANDLED BY THE DIRECTOR AND ACTRESSES).
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2011-04-21, 10:30 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Obviously, it's a downer to get stereotyped in any way, but I get real upset about gay theatre stereotypes and stuff.
I go to / participate in theatre because I like theatre. It's fun and emotional, and presents a physical and mental challenge to live up to the role and inhabit it, and to learn the songs and choreography and act the part well.
I like Lady GaGa because she is a very creative person who sings catchy songs. I think she is an excellent songwriter and choreographer and performer, and she has a great voice. I also like her crazy fashion and her design concepts. Finally, I like what she stands for- she's a very good person and very generous with the use of her money and fame to help improve the lives of others.
I enjoy Glee because I like music and theatre and because I sing in a high school choir and because I'm helping to found an all male a capella group. I guess that means I connect to the show. I also enjoy the humour of the show and the quality of the acting (more connections here). I really admire the treatment of minority characters, particularly the exploration of Kurt and Blaine's relationship and Sue and her sister's interaction. Furthermore, I really admire the show's treatment of people with mental retardation and queer youth as well.
I like theatre, GaGa, and Glee, yes, but not because I am gay. I think I like them more because I am gay and that allows a further level of connection to all three, but that is not why I like them. This doesn't apply to GaGa and Glee, but I must point out that I've like theatre from before when I liked boys.
Although, another reason I think that so many gay men are drawn to all three is that (aside from audience connectivity) well, it's rather that most straight men are not drawn to them. I guess it's a different facet of the connectivity thing, but I think queer folk are just naturally less inhibited about their perceived masculinity. At one time, theatre may have been (and still is some places) a venue where oppressed gay men could step out of their constricting lives for an hour or two to show their worth by dancing their hearts out in front of three hundred people, but now I think it's more that more straight men than gay men feel theatre is a threat to their masculinity. Ergo gay men are more commonly found in the theatre community because they don't feel worried about it's effect on their perceived masculinity.
Food for thought.Avatar by Dihan
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2011-04-21, 10:32 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
Honestly? I think Kurt is a complete jerk most of the time. His relationship with his father is the only consistently good thing I like about him. His dad is just awesome.
And I've heard he is basically a self-insert for the show's writer Ryan Murphy. Kurt's characterization and coming out story were pretty much lifted from Ryan Murphy's life. So if he's a stereotype, atleast he's based off someone real instead of a confused idea of what a gay teenager should be.
I much prefer the episodes about the two cheerleaders as far as gay characters go.Crackers don't matter.