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Thread: LGBTAitp 34: <3!!
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2013-04-19, 03:49 PM (ISO 8601)
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LGBTAitp 34: <3!!
Hello, everyone, and welcome to the thirty fourth beautiful installment of the thread for the discussion, celebration and support of of everyone who isn't quite heterocisnormative.
Please note that although the title of the thread names only the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Asexual communities, it is intended as an all inclusive environment. Everyone is welcome. L, G, B,T, A, Q, I, A, N, V, P, R, Q, Ω, ♅, everyone. As long as they behave themselves.
If you have a question or two about LGBTA+, you can ask it here! You can ask for advice and support in here.
In addition, many members are willing to give private advice one on one, either through email or PM. The best way to do this is asking for PM help in thread, or else to PM one of the following people:
Name: Especially familiar with the topic(s) of
KenderWizard: General/basics, gender and feminism, bisexuality
Musashi: General/basics, asexuality/demisexuality, depression
noparlpf: General/basics, asexuality, greysexuality, biology
Lea Plath: Genderfluidity
Lycunadari: Genderqueer and agendered
Eldest: General/basics, bisexuality
Karen Lynn: General/basics, pansexuality, polyamory
HMS Sophia: Trans stuff (esp hormones)
Lix Lorn: General/basics
Tanail: Trans stuff (esp emotional issues)
Absol197: Gender identity issues
Warkitty: Academic/technical discussions
Lentrax: General/basics, depression, bullying
Asta Kask: Biochemistry/neurobiology
Wormwood74: Transgender legal issues, transgender outside contacts
Astrella: GSRM rights, feminism, trans stuff
Asteron Questar: Relationships, depression
Some people are also willing to talk off-board, through Skype or email or other means, this is especially useful if your question involves board-forbidden topics such as religion or politics. Also, we can't (and ethically shouldn't!) give medical advice. If you need medical advice, please see a professional!
Here are the rules of this thread!
- Everyone is welcome. Let's try to keep from seeming otherwise.
- Keep this topic free of politics and religion. (so, don't violate the board rules, plz)
- It's beyond the scope of this thread to discuss whether LGBT is "Right." (And really, most discussions probably should avoid moralizing too much anyway)
- Please refrain from posting sexually explicit content. (Keep it friendly as well as board safe )
Here are the links for the previous threads, where much of use or interest may be found:Spoiler- LGBT people in the playground
- LGBT people in the playground - part II
- LGBTitp - part III
- LGBTitp 4: We are a family?
- LGBTitp - Part Five
- LGBTitp - Part Six
- LGBTitp - Part Seven
- LGBTitp - Part Eight
- LGBTitp - Part Nine
- LGBTAitp - Part Ten
- LGBTAitp - Part Eleven
- LGBTAitp - Part Twelve
- LGBTAitp - Part Thirteen
- LGBTAitp - Part Fourteen
- LGBTAitp - Part Fifteen
- LGBTAitp - Part Sixteen
- LGBTAitp - Part Seventeen
- LGBTAitp - Part Eighteen!
- LGBTAitp - Part Nineteen
- LGBTAitp - Part Twenty - Critical Hit!
- LGBTAitp - Part Twenty-One - BLACKJACK!
- LGBTAitP Part 22: The Best There Is
- LGBTAitP Part 23: Et tu, ~Bianca?
- LGBTAitP: Alphabet Soup-with 24 different Vitamins!
- LGBTAitP part 25: Doing Away With Subtitles
- LGBTAitP 26: No Time For Snappy Titles
- LGBTAitP 27: Of Shoes, and Ships, and Sealing Wax
- LGBTAitP #28: Come Taste the Rainbow!
- LGBTAitP #29: The Rainbow Outreach Program
- LGBTAitP 30: Free Cuddles (Enquire Within)
- LGBTAitP #31: Cuddles Are On Back Order. Have Some Snuggles!
- LGBTAitp #32: The Great Plushie Invasion!
- LGBTAitp #34: The Thread at the End of the Rainbow!
And, for reference, here is the Thousand&Wordster Dictionary of Commonly Used LGBTAitp Words and Phrases
Spoiler
Lagerbeta: A fine brewski to be drunk by queers and allies.
LGBT: Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans*
Trans*: Transsexual and Transgender
LGBTA: LGBT+Asexual/Allies
QUILTBAG:SpoilerQ - Queer and Questioning
U - Unidentified
I - Intersex
L - Lesbian
T - Transgender, Transexual
B - Bisexual
A - Asexual
G - Gay, Genderqueer
Allies: Straight people that support equality for sexuality and gender minorities.
MtF: Male-to-Female: A woman born with male nibblies, who may or may not be seeking HRT and/or SRS. (AKA: trans woman)
FtM: Female-to-Male: A man born with female nibblies, who may or may not be seeking HRT and/or SRS. (AKA: trans man)
GQ: Genderqueer.
CS: Cis-sexual: sex and gender match (a male with male nibblies, a female with female nibblies.
TS: Transsexual: Sex and gender disparity.
HRT: Hormone replacement therapy. MtF's take more progestrogens and oestrogens and FtM's take more testosterone (I think?)
SRS: Sex Reassignment Surgery: Surgery to replace/transform a vagina into a penis, or vice versa depending on direction. Mastectomies or plastic surgery may be used on breasts.
FFS: Facial Feminization Surgery: Plastic surgery to reduce chin/nose/cheekbones. not very common.
AFAB/AMAB: Assigned Female/Male at Birth
FAAB/MAAB: Female/Male Assigned at Birth.
Man: A cisman or transman. Male.
Woman: A ciswoman or transwoman. Female.
Androgyne: Gender Identity with male and female aspects.
Genderfluid: Someone who fluctuates between male and female.
Agendered: Someone who feels neither male nor female.
Third-gendered: Someone who fits in a local society's third gender, usually male performing female tasks, occasionally vice versa.
Masculine: Something generally associated with men.
Feminine: Something generally associated with women.
Lesbian: A woman who is attracted to women.
Gay: A man who is attracted to men.
Homosexual: A person who is attracted to members of their gender.
Heterosexual: A person who is attracted to members of the opposite gender.
Bisexual: A person who is attracted to two genders (usually men and women, sometimes transgender instead of one of those).
Pansexual: A person who is attracted to people regardless of gender.
Asexual: A person who does not feel any/some sexual attraction.
Demisexual: A person who is sexually attracted to someone(s) they have formed an intense emotional relationship with.
Polyamorous: A person who is interested in a relationship with more than one person.
Radosexual: A person who is only attracted to rad people.
Pomosexual: A person who avoids SO labels.
Sexual Orientation: How one identifies who they are attracted to. (SO)
Gender Identity: How one feels inside society's idea of "man, woman, or other". (GI)
Gender Expression: How one expresses their GI to society. (GE)
Significant Other(s): Person you are in a relationship with. (SO)
Last edited by The Giant; 2014-03-28 at 05:45 PM.
Cheerfairy, Kenderwoman and Geologist by Succubus, Feminist Geomancer by Astrella, Kender Wizard by me
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2013-04-19, 03:58 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Some news to open with: the Boy Scouts of America is putting forward a proposal to be voted on that would, "If approved, ... mean that 'no youth may be denied membership in the Boy Scouts of America on the basis of sexual orientation or preference alone.' The BSA will maintain the current membership policy for all adults," (Boy Scouts public relations director Deron Smith said).
Source & more info.
Obviously not as far reaching as it should be as a gay member would be kicked out when they stop being a scout and (would otherwise) become a leader, and it's just a proposal, but given how staunchly they were defending their right to exclude it's a sign of progress if nothing else.Princess in the streets.
Princess in the sheets.
Don't touch me I'm royalty.
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2013-04-19, 04:23 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Mrr. Earlier, I had a rather unpleasant experience. I was walking down the street (en femme, as I m full time these days) when I passed a group of girls. Suddenly, there came a cry of "It's a man! Hey, it's a man! Let's see your d***!"
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2013-04-19, 04:25 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Day of Silence is done with. I'm not good at being quiet, but I managed.
LGBTitP
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2013-04-19, 04:26 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Well, that was really rude. And jerkish. And stupid. And...
I could keep up the litany of descriptive words for a while, but you get the idea.
And Kender, there's an extra [/quote] at the end of that.LGBTA+itP
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2013-04-19, 04:31 PM (ISO 8601)
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2013-04-19, 04:36 PM (ISO 8601)
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2013-04-19, 05:08 PM (ISO 8601)
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2013-04-19, 05:41 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Cheerfairy, Kenderwoman and Geologist by Succubus, Feminist Geomancer by Astrella, Kender Wizard by me
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2013-04-19, 05:55 PM (ISO 8601)
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2013-04-19, 06:19 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Aaaaand all the stuff from last thread, gone. Copy/paste function I want to light you on fire right now.
Wow. People can be terrible at times. I wonder what coul possibly prompt people to scream "flash me" and think its okay? If they were a gaggle of guys and asked you to flash your boobs you could get them in trouble with the law, yes?
Blargle. I work retail, and could not avail the situation.
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2013-04-19, 06:30 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
What was the Day of Silence?
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2013-04-19, 06:34 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
So, if a series ends with all female regulars paired off with someone else or dead, and the two male leads who already have massive ho-yay living alone together in a space with only one bed, and a cat, where is that on the (Possibly unintentional) subtext-o-meter?
http://www.dayofsilence.org/
There you go
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2013-04-19, 06:56 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Sounds like a great way to finally ..speak up on LGBT-issues.
I'm wondering something about LGBT. Am I the only one who thinks that's the worst name ever for a movement? I mean, try speaking it out loud, it has no vowels. No wonder I know of it only because of internet discussions and flyers in the canteen.
Perhabs english speaking people have fewer problems with that word. Don't know. Sounds awkward to me, especially with the other additions, like Q, A and plus.
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2013-04-19, 07:07 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Think FBI, not NASA.
... I came to appreciate that mountains make poor receptacles for dreams.
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2013-04-19, 07:11 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Nice one Bloo~ XD
But yes. We say "Ell-Gee-Bee-Tee-Cue-Ei" not... L'guhbutkuh or something.
Personally, I don't think I have ever mentioned LGBTA except in reference to this thread. There's usually a better contextual version such as queer, trans, gay, gay rights, etc.
Alright. *dons old, battered armor*
No, the question is why do you keep phrasing questions like the world is out to punish you? that's what I meant by you sound entitled, like you're mad you're not getting the rewards for a certain form of behavior.
Chivalry is not unpopular, otherwise it wouldn't have the social traction necessary to still exist.
Chivalry does not have a bad reputation. Men who lean on chivalry to excuse their behaviors do have a bad rep. they may all themselves chivalrous but they aren't. The bad rep belongs solely to jack asses.
Corollary: some people are just terrible people. Some people just want to bring others down. This has nothing to do with your traits, and everything to do with theirs. See people ranting about "Feminazis" despite there being so few who for the bill. It's easy to dismiss someone for a buzzword. Ignore that.
I had a guy get upset I didn't stop the bus for him... After he remained silent when I asked if he wanted to catch this bus. He called me a slur of names, raised his hand at me, threatened my life, because he's a cantankerous homeless jerk who blames the world for his faults. He called me a [n-word]. That doesn't mean suddenly the world is against African folk. Someone gets upset you open a door, calls you chivalrous as a pejorative. That doesn't mean people are against chivalry.
And "We as a society" is far too broad to make such declarative statements. Sub societies exist, and each continent seems to have several of it own societal pools. Society at that level has very few common denominators; they don't want to die, do want to procreate, and don't want to suffer. That's about it, and even that is glossing over a lot of quibbles.
Have we, as a society, beocme so paranoid and insecure about ourselves that we don't trust chivalrous people into meaning well without considering the possibility of insults first?
The honest truth is people use service as a form of power. You are throwing an action or series of actions that you admit are rooted in sexism an based on courting behavior at people who probably have their own baggage, and expecting their personal takes not to matter because you were just 'being chivalrous', how dare they not respond the way you expect them to? There's a lot here, and most of it is that chivalry as presented exists as a form of expectation, almost codified privilege use.
There is that, yes.
Also, if its based on the subject matter, shouldnt it be "Sorry Mario, but Princess didn't need you.
Come to think of it , i think I instinctively hesitate to going out of the way to help men physically (such as opening doors) because I'm afraid they will feel "taken care of" and not like it.
I've never got anything bad for holding open a door for a lady though. * Buuuut....I dont go outside often and also I live in Texas.
I'm really touchy feely, but I don't really bother with a lot of my guy friends because it makes them out of sorts (or creeps me out on occasion).
Exactly! Thanks Keveak.
It's an objective presentation of a distinctly subjective viewpoint. Taking self opinion as fact and projecting it. Good to have a framework for that phenomenon.
Regardless, it's strange that the actions of the man are presented from the man's perspective, and the actions of the woman are... Guessed at from the man's perspective.
On an unrelated and sad note, I fell over this story. I do not know the person asking for help, but it sounds like as miserable situation and I was hoping to ask if anyone knows a way to help people who have been thrown out from home in California. ;_;
Damn you, fiscal responsibility and crushing weight of socioeconomics!
No. I, personally, am frowning on people who use 'chivalrous' as a justification for acting in the letter of a thing and not the spirit and expect recompense. The demonstration of Gallant was merely an example to illustrate that point.
I think the idealogical concept of chivalry should apply to anyone in a position of power, retroengineered or no. Gender is irrelevant; if your position gives you authority over someone else, stick to it. Or at least the parts that have aged well (so... skipping the bits about never retreating, religion, and nationalism). Don't lie, be generous, protect the weak--whomsoever that may be--and do good rather than evil. That's hardly something to whine about.
But that is not chivalry.
Chivalry is one of those things that were codified after the fact to make younger generations fall in line, much like bushido. "The crusaders were chivalrous! You should be like them, and not such a prat!" and all.
Chivalry is also part and parcel of courtly behavior, including courtly love. Further, the permutations need to be taken into account. Chivalry is (part of) an equation, and it is disingenuous to point at 2+2 and say it has nothing to do with 4, only with 2s.
Now paying for people is a generous thing and it should be encouraged.
When your 'generosity' looks an awful lot like being smug and rubbing your money in my face and buying me something so I'll owe you later, then it's not generous. It's manipulative. And yes, I've both dealt with those kinds of people, and thought I was when I wasn't. Luckily I am able to talk through these sorts of things...
And there we are!
Yes. All sound.
My phone doesn't think orthopraxic is a word.
Well, some people think they're interrelated or synonymous. *Also, you're not allowed to be a nice guy, because of "nice guys."
Personally? I like the Old code as presented in dragonheart.
"A knight is sworn to Valor
*His word speaks only Truth
*His heart knows only Virtue
*His blade defends the Helpless
*His might upholds the Weak
*His wrath undoes the Wicked"
That guy right there? Be that guy. No one will be able to seriously hassle you for chivalry ever.
Also my favorite rendition of the Paladin Code. And just general excellent advice.
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2013-04-19, 07:31 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
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2013-04-19, 07:42 PM (ISO 8601)
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2013-04-19, 07:57 PM (ISO 8601)
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2013-04-19, 08:11 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
I'm pretty sure 34 >3, actually.
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2013-04-19, 08:54 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
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2013-04-19, 10:12 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
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2013-04-19, 10:52 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Oooh new thread!
*booby traps entire thread with cookie traps*
Also, I'd volunteer myself for the question-answering group, especially for the more academic/technical side of things.
...
*prepares extra special plate of cookies for heliomance*Hail to the Lord of Death and Destruction!
CATNIP FOR THE CAT GOD! YARN FOR THE YARN THRONE! MILK FOR THE MILK BOWL!
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2013-04-19, 11:53 PM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
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2013-04-20, 01:09 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
They're so very clearly gay that I can't think of something that isn't a stereotype to convey the level of camp that must be?
So basically the only way it could have been more overt was if it were stated directly. And that it was so clear without them stating it overtly is kind of weird. Unless they're like, brothers in a bunk-bed context or something, since age and such can have some influence on the variables, but... really...
Your phone is probably right. I'm never quite clear on the conjugation of obscure words that I hardly ever use. Basically just throwaway doggerel like saying orthodoxical instead of orthodox. Orthodoxy vs. orthopraxy so I probably should have just had orthoprax. But that feels weird so I added something on without thinking.
Curses, you're taking away my most convenient excuse for not being a good person.
Huh. I'd forgotten about that. I should rewatch that sometime.
SiuiS:Spoiler
Heliomance: That's rotten.
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2013-04-20, 02:35 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Aye, the dragonheart oath is great, and truly are good words to live by. But so are these.
“Be without fear in the face of your enemies.
Be brave and upright that God may love thee.
Speak the truth always, even if it leads to your death.
Safeguard the helpless and do no wrong – that is your oath.”
Helio. I am sorry people can be jerks. *hugs*
Edit: according to my ipad Dragonheart is not a word. Silly autocorrect.
Edit 2: you can also add me to the list of folks who can help, Kender. Please list me as depression, bullying, and general advice please?Last edited by Lentrax; 2013-04-20 at 02:40 AM.
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2013-04-20, 03:13 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
I try flirting with guys, coming onto guys and whatnot, but I keep thinking of Cody. I kind of want to move on but don't at the same time. Heck, I even had a dream last night about a cute guy I met at a pub (completely fictional, never been in a pub) and we ended up going home together and cuddling and then I woke up crying and feeling empty. I don't even know...
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2013-04-20, 03:21 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
I just want you to be happy, regardless of whoever it's with. Seriously, don't be sad. Find someone else to help you get over me, someone who can be there to snuggle and hold you.
Edit: Great, I tried talking to him on Skype to cheer him up and I think I just made him feel worse.Last edited by Chess435; 2013-04-20 at 05:18 AM.
^~Cody T.~^
"I see now that the circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant; it is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are." - Mewtwo
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2013-04-20, 03:22 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
Coidzor: the possibility did run through my head, but... Well, I don't want to go down that road. That road leads to headbutting things. And I have a horn, so that's either murder, or if they survive it's a lobotomy and this practicing medicine sans license.
don't know what to tell ya, mate. That's going to happen. You can cherish the sorrow if you like, but then you are forcing yourself to feel bad.
Other than that... I dunno. I can't really do polite relationship talk.
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2013-04-20, 03:46 AM (ISO 8601)
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Re: LGBTAitp 34: <3!
*claims the thread for New Zealand*
@Mynxae: There's that saying, "It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all".
Can't tell how valid it is. Personally, I find it's a little stupid. But maybe it'll be more helpful to you, who knows.
And if it doesn't, please accept my humble e-hugs.Originally Posted by on Dwarf Fortress succession gamesOriginally Posted by Dwarf Fortress 0.40.01 bugs