Peelee's Chicken Fried Random Banter Thread #220

**Peelee** · 2018-12-15, 12:56 PM (ISO 8601)

Southern-Style Random Guidelines for a Random Banter (rules is for the gov'ment).

1. Spam. Good for eatin', bad for postin'. For the purposes of RB, one word posts are generally considered spam. Likewise, posts that are nothing but *actions like this* are also be considered tasty, tasty spam. Remember that the quality of the post's content is much better than the speed of your response.

2. This ain't the Play by Post or Town forum, or the Silly Message Board Games forum, or the Structured Games forum. Please avoid continuous roleplay or mock battles and fights such as the "competition for control of the universe" now y'hear?

3. Now look, if it's already a thread, ain't no good bringin' it to RB. RB has such a big ol' range of subject matter even restricted to the little snippets that probably don't warrant their own thread, it doesn't need legitimate thread topics cluttering it up as well. The exception to this is to bring something that is off-topic from one thread, but on-topic for RB and the subject doesn't warrant a thread of its own.

4. Don't advertise other threads in RB. Just because these new threads be movin' at speeds more appropriate to a message board than an IM session doesn't mean you need to come over to RB and drag people kickin' and screamin' into posting in your latest brainchild.

5. Please don't post single line posts alerting us to your current status -- as in "I'm back." This is Random Banter, not the cardboard sign in your yard sayin' your outta jail.

6. Don't poke, kick or bump the thread, you're liable to get shot at. It will move at whatever pace it wants to. Also, don't you go makin' Captain Obvious comments akin to "hoo doggy, the thread is fast today."

7. Random Banter can only be as good, or as entertaining, as y'all make it. Demands to be entertained gonna be fallin' on deaf ears les'n you can add something more meaningful to the conversation.

8. As this here is a public forum, where the current topic is nicely recorded for you, and not a conversation where you could have missed the beginning, please refrain from asking something to the effect of "What's the topic?". Please take the time to read up a bit first.

9. Thread Creator must include the words "Random" and "Banter" as well as the thread #. Try to be concise as well. (That means short.) Thread Creator must also be the smartest and best-lookin' guy in the South. Little joke there for ya.

10. Every post should contain two visible, legible complete sentences, Subject and Predicate. C'mon, this is your fifth time in third grade, somethin's gotta've gotten through by now.

11. Remember, Random Banter is not your IM client. If any y'all wanna have a back and forth discussion with just one person, look in their contact infos for IM details.

12. Whenever a new thread is created, all "first post", "first page", and all posts of that nature will be deleted by the ~~gov'ment~~ administrators. Please avoid doing this, as it is frustrating for them to deal with one-lined posts like this.

13. No double posting. Not gonna do it. Nah gah dah!

14. Once you have made a Random Banter thread, ya gotta wait 50 threads before making another one.

15. If'n you can avoid dibs calling on making the next thread, that will avoid people needing to wait if the thread hits 50 pages while the dibs-caller is drunk on the couch.

Spoiler: All them previous Random Banters!

Show

**DataNinja** · 2018-12-15, 01:05 PM (ISO 8601)

Well, I can certainly say that that's a unique take on the rules. I see you followed through on what you said you'd do, at least.

(I imagine the next person's probably gonna want to go through and get the rules from a thread or two ago, though. For comprehension's sake.

)

**Peelee** · 2018-12-15, 01:10 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by DataNinja

Well, I can certainly say that that's a unique take on the rules. I see you followed through on what you said you'd do, at least.

(I imagine the next person's probably gonna want to go through and get the rules from a thread or two ago, though. For comprehension's sake.

)

I aim to please. Think I got most of the stereotypes across most of the regions. Even threw a little Foghorn Leghorn in there for good measure.

**Bartmanhomer** · 2018-12-15, 01:18 PM (ISO 8601)

Yay a new random banter thread!

**Peelee** · 2018-12-15, 01:24 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Insane Jeenyus

sounds like it is time to step up your game and have a stair-down. The flow of punhood can reach a torrent, but trickle along the next moment.

I could always try to shore up the puns so they don't flood the thread.

**Teddy** · 2018-12-15, 01:38 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Rockphed

My sleep schedule has gotten completely backwards. Anyone have any suggestions for fixing it? I suppose I could stay up for another 12 hours and just go to bed at a normal time.

That's generally what I do when I go completely off track, albeit with mixed results as a natural inclination to be alert in the evening has caused me to overshoot my regular bedtime on one or two occasions anyway. Also, if you accidently take a nap in the afternoon, it could completely ruin your attempt if you're unlucky.

Originally Posted by Florian

Not being a native english-speaker, the reverence to and the pun options by are completely unknown and not understandable to me. Now I feel a bit discriminated by completely being left out of the loop.

Aren't puns common in German, or do you just feel you don't have the English vocabulary to get into English puns?

Originally Posted by Florian

Depends. The human body runs on an internal clock which can be independent of nature. One of the reasons is that we generally are healthy and have build up reserves, some of the benefits of living in first or second world countries, while our sleep cycle is ancient beyond measure. Strength of will also allows us to bypass the natural day/night cycle and get accustomed to an outside clock, to be able to work in shifts.

Some less human-positive reasons are indoors work and modern lighting disconnecting us from the regular day/night cycle, and societal expectations causing us to feel the need to be more alert in the evening.

**Qwertystop** · 2018-12-15, 01:50 PM (ISO 8601)

Well, that seems to be the most casual a next-thread prompt (in the old thread) has ever been.

**Insane Jeenyus** · 2018-12-15, 02:00 PM (ISO 8601)

Spoiler: A story with no end

Show

I will start and type until my heaart can take no more. Then I will return and continue.

It started with a ripping sensation like a muscle ripping, but no pain. I have had my calf tear 3 time. I know that pain. what came next was even greater. I felt my strength, which was great then, leave my arms and legs. It was the worst pain I could ever imagine. I could not stand strait up, it was that bad.

I went to my down stairs neighbor and tapped out SOS on his door's window. He and his wife took me to the nearest Veteran's Affairs Medical center where my friend, who was a football player in High School, and a really big dude from the ER to help me walk in.

When I was asked how high the pain level was on the scale of 1 to 10, I said 11 and not as a joke. The pain resembled an attack of appendicitis, but instead of on the right side, it was on the left. So after an initial work up of stats, they let me sit in pain, not sure what to do.

6 Hours later, I allegedly said I felt much better and would like to go home. A nurse realized that was not right at all, so he did a cogency test on me which I epicly failed. another work up showed my blood pressure at something like 30'/20's - that is not a misprint. My temp was listed on records as 105 plus.

More to come

had to stop to run and do some errands.

on 30 October, 2011, 2100 hrs[or somewhere around that time] the medical professionals went into hyper drive. Antibiotics, epinephrine, cat scan with contrast dye, and a scope through the abdominal muscle wall. The would normally do a through the intestine scope to find the leak, but time was of the essence. Obviously.

the following things happened over the next 6 weeks starting from day one:
3 chest tubes, one for a scope to discover I had LAM disease and double pneumonia. they hooked me up to a ventilator.
epinephrine drip for 34 days, or there abouts, they flooded my body with 14 L. of saline to flush out as much of the fecal fauna out of my body

the necrotizing of tissues caused repeated surgeries, 8 to be exact. That includes my appendix.

I woke several times during the 'big sleep', once in mid November when all of the fentenol had to be cleared off the shelf. It just so happens that fentenol is what they used to keep me under. If a drug is associated with 3 deaths, it is the bigg pharma's requirement to have all hospitals to destroy that batch. For three days they had me on a drip of Oxycontin. being in a coma under the effects of this drug has the potential of fragmenting one's moral core, as I was told by my brother. I passed a test of moral and ethical cohesion, then he tested me on my capability to calculate from memory the needs of an electrical job. At the time I did not realize what he was up to, but that sneak ol' critter had tested me then told me what he had done. I laughed at what he had done.

Over time I had to be taughtt to walk again and my left arm was non functional. At forst the docs and nurses had missed a stroke, but it was the result of another injury. I had to have my arm "re-awakened" with a TENS unit. Lots of pain there. It left welts. But I knew what it was for and my ultimate goal.

My memory was shot, my Strength was just gone, my balance was shot and my memory was so gorram scrambled I was not sure of where to go much less which to start.I spent 3 weeks [url=http://healthsouthruskrehab.com/] in a rehab clinic[/url where I was treated for much of what I needed to start. Those were some more of my heroes.

Those 9 weeks were like the first steps of a baby to the journey that is ongoing.

There were many return trips for a recurring infection, were if I had ignored just one of those times, I would not be here today to tell you of this.

Now it is late, I am hungry and my feet hurt from the 5 miles I walked to run my errands. But it is worth the pain as I got 4 gifts for Christmas taken care of. Now that I have a job, I get to give!

**Peelee** · 2018-12-15, 02:28 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Insane Jeenyus

It was the worst pain I could ever imagine. I could not stand strait up, it was that bad.

When I was asked how high the pain level was on the scale of 1 to 10, I said 11 and not as a joke.

Hey, I had that before too! Id bet money it was something different, because when I had this back in high school, the nurse got the headmaster to take me to the hospital, where the ER doc identified the problem, sent me to another hospital, had me meet with another doc, bumped someone from their surgery so I could get in immediately, and fixed the issue, all within a couple hours. Very easy to diagnose, very easy to fix, very short timeline to get all that done.

**HalfTangible** · 2018-12-15, 02:35 PM (ISO 8601)

Is it still a new thread smell at 10 posts?

... eh. It's a smell.

**Anonymouswizard** · 2018-12-15, 02:53 PM (ISO 8601)

Neeeeew thread!

Now I have a question for the lot of you. Why is it that whenever I tell somebody I was with a lovely lady the other day they immediately assume I'm dating them? There's plenty of other things I could be doing with women!

**Peelee** · 2018-12-15, 03:00 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Anonymouswizard

Neeeeew thread!

Now I have a question for the lot of you. Why is it that whenever I tell somebody I was with a lovely lady the other day they immediately assume I'm dating them? There's plenty of other things I could be doing with women!

You talk about women you're attracted to with relatively large frequency, so it's not a long jump to "spending time with a lovely lady? I wonder if it was a daaaaaaate!"

Also we're all apparently back in grade school.

**Knaight** · 2018-12-15, 03:05 PM (ISO 8601)

Now, I mighta suggested that y'all would see an Ar-kansas accent outta me if y'all brought the southern. Ain't happening. Not now, not never.

**Peelee** · 2018-12-15, 03:07 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Knaight

Now, I mighta suggested that y'all would see an Ar-kansas accent outta me if y'all brought the southern. Ain't happening. Not now, not never.

Ya know, if you bring out that accent and then come by the church, there's some fried chicken and mac 'n cheese waitin' for ya.

**HalfTangible** · 2018-12-15, 03:39 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Anonymouswizard

Neeeeew thread!

Now I have a question for the lot of you. Why is it that whenever I tell somebody I was with a lovely lady the other day they immediately assume I'm dating them? There's plenty of other things I could be doing with women!

Because humans work a lot on implication and suggestion rather than outright statement of fact. When you say "i was with a lovely lady" that implies you were with her because you like-like her, hence date. Otherwise you might say "I was with a friend the other day"

**Florian** · 2018-12-15, 03:54 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Teddy

Aren't puns common in German, or do you just feel you don't have the English vocabulary to get into English puns?

Ok, that is a bit hard to explain. It´s a language barrier thing. My spoken english is quite passable, but when I read english texts, my understanding of the sounds of the letters and pronunciation of the words is fully informed by my native language. That has the side effect to make jokes based on homophones often fail for me, as the words simply sound quite different to me. For example, when speaking, I automatically pronounce the words in regular Oxford English, when reading, I mentally "pronounce" the words in German.

Originally Posted by Teddy

Some less human-positive reasons are indoors work and modern lighting disconnecting us from the regular day/night cycle, and societal expectations causing us to feel the need to be more alert in the evening.

You can also add to that the side effects of most televisions and other devices with a screen. They are generally synched to the blue color spectrum, which triggers the same reaction as daylight and will keep us awake. Broadly speaking, it´s not the best idea to watch television or fool around with a laptop when trying to fall asleep, unless you have installed some kind of app that can switch the screen to the red spectrum.

**Peelee** · 2018-12-15, 04:02 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Florian

Ok, that is a bit hard to explain. It´s a language barrier thing. My spoken english is quite passable, but when I read english texts, my understanding of the sounds of the letters and pronunciation of the words is fully informed by my native language. That has the side effect to make jokes based on homophones often fail for me, as the words simply sound quite different to me. For example, when speaking, I automatically pronounce the words in regular Oxford English, when reading, I mentally "pronounce" the words in German.

Are homonym puns better?

**Florian** · 2018-12-15, 04:30 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Anonymouswizard

Now I have a question for the lot of you. Why is it that whenever I tell somebody I was with a lovely lady the other day they immediately assume I'm dating them? There's plenty of other things I could be doing with women!

Dunno, might be a cultural thing and actually quite an interesting topic by itself. I noticed that in some cultures, forms of communication rather take the indirect route by implying a lot of things, instead of speaking them out straight

**Anonymouswizard** · 2018-12-15, 04:40 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Peelee

You talk about women you're attracted to with relatively large frequency, so it's not a long jump to "spending time with a lovely lady? I wonder if it was a daaaaaaate!"

Also we're all apparently back in grade school.

That's.... actually a good point. To be fair at least one of the people who said it knows I fancy her, so for them it's a perfectly plausible leap to check.

Also, I don't want to go back to primary school. None of the teachers could understand how I interpreted texts!

Originally Posted by HalfTangible

Because humans work a lot on implication and suggestion rather than outright statement of fact. When you say "i was with a lovely lady" that implies you were with her because you like-like her, hence date. Otherwise you might say "I was with a friend the other day"

Bah! I say such stuff all the time! Aren't I allowed to describe people as lovely anymore? Bad for the waistline, but lovely.

(In all seriousness, yeah, I get what you mean. I have a tendency to be complimentary when I talk about somebody I like, even when I don't like-like them, so I can see the confusion.)

Originally Posted by Florian

Dunno, might be a cultural thing and actually quite an interesting topic by itself. I noticed that in some cultures, forms of communication rather take the indirect route by implying a lot of things, instead of speaking them out straight

Yep, I think maybe spending yesterday with a couple of Russians kicked me into thinking a bit more direct (kind of have to be for everything to be clear).

**Peelee** · 2018-12-15, 04:52 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Anonymouswizard

I have a tendency to be complimentary when I talk about somebody I like, even when I don't like-like them, so I can see the confusion.

Huh. That's odd, I don't recall you ever tossing out compliments about me eveOH I SEE HOW IT IS.

**Anonymouswizard** · 2018-12-15, 05:19 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Peelee

Huh. That's odd, I don't recall you ever tossing out compliments about me eveOH I SEE HOW IT IS.

Well you don't see me talking about you to other people do you

In all seriousness, I have this strange tendency that when I like somebody I'll be really complimentary behind their back, but insult them to their face. The only person who is isn't true with is a friend who already has enough self esteem issues.

**Dimonite** · 2018-12-15, 05:34 PM (ISO 8601)

Ooooh, shiny new thread!

Originally Posted by Anonymouswizard

In all seriousness, I have this strange tendency that when I like somebody I'll be really complimentary behind their back, but insult them to their face. The only person who is isn't true with is a friend who already has enough self esteem issues.

I don't think that's particularly strange. Good friend + unserious insult = funny times!

**SZbNAhL** · 2018-12-15, 06:00 PM (ISO 8601)

Nothing like a new thread in the morning*. You can tell it's Peelee made it because the title contains culinary referencec I had to look up. And also because his name's in the title. And because he made the first post.

*I mean, it's morning somewhere, right?

**Rockphed** · 2018-12-15, 09:00 PM (ISO 8601)

Well, my plan to stay up for 12 hours crashed and burned about 9 this morning. I finally woke up about an hour ago. Now I am trying to decide between staying up until what I want to do tomorrow (from noon to 3), or trying to go to sleep at 2 (in about 5 hours). Maybe I will get some work done between now and then.

**Insane Jeenyus** · 2018-12-15, 09:03 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Peelee

Hey, I had that before too! Id bet money it was something different, because when I had this back in high school, the nurse got the headmaster to take me to the hospital, where the ER doc identified the problem, sent me to another hospital, had me meet with another doc, bumped someone from their surgery so I could get in immediately, and fixed the issue, all within a couple hours. Very easy to diagnose, very easy to fix, very short timeline to get all that done.

any kind of intestinal "mishap" such as, but not limited to, Sharp force trauma, GSW, diverticulitis or appendicitis

absolutely, positively needs
let me emphasize
ABSOLUTELY NEEDS
to be treated within 30 minutes for the best chance of survival

After the initial event, a victim has a 40% chance of survival, this drops by 6% every hour. The base number of 60% is only 30% for diabetics.

Septic shock is not something to be lackadaisical about!!!

This is scary stuff here. I hope it is understood by all about how serious I am here.

**Durkoala** · 2018-12-15, 09:14 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Anonymouswizard

In all seriousness, I have this strange tendency that when I like somebody I'll be really complimentary behind their back, but insult them to their face. The only person who is isn't true with is a friend who already has enough self esteem issues.

Snap! Except for the complimentary part unless I'm directly asked about them.

I'm always unsure if it's something I should try to change, as a lot of people don't seem to get my sense of humour at the best of times, but on the other hand it's exactly what's expected from somebody of my heritage and nobody's actually complained, so idk...

**Tvtyrant** · 2018-12-15, 09:16 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Insane Jeenyus

Spoiler: A story with no end

Show

I will start and type until my heaart can take no more. Then I will return and continue.

It started with a ripping sensation like a muscle ripping, but no pain. I have had my calf tear 3 time. I know that pain. what came next was even greater. I felt my strength, which was great then, leave my arms and legs. It was the worst pain I could ever imagine. I could not stand strait up, it was that bad.

I went to my down stairs neighbor and tapped out SOS on his door's window. He and his wife took me to the nearest Veteran's Affairs Medical center where my friend, who was a football player in High School, and a really big dude from the ER to help me walk in.

When I was asked how high the pain level was on the scale of 1 to 10, I said 11 and not as a joke. The pain resembled an attack of appendicitis, but instead of on the right side, it was on the left. So after an initial work up of stats, they let me sit in pain, not sure what to do.

6 Hours later, I allegedly said I felt much better and would like to go home. A nurse realized that was not right at all, so he did a cogency test on me which I epicly failed. another work up showed my blood pressure at something like 30'/20's - that is not a misprint. My temp was listed on records as 105 plus.

More to come

had to stop to run and do some errands.

on 30 October, 2011, 2100 hrs[or somewhere around that time] the medical professionals went into hyper drive. Antibiotics, epinephrine, cat scan with contrast dye, and a scope through the abdominal muscle wall. The would normally do a through the intestine scope to find the leak, but time was of the essence. Obviously.

the following things happened over the next 6 weeks starting from day one:
3 chest tubes, one for a scope to discover I had LAM disease and double pneumonia. they hooked me up to a ventilator.
epinephrine drip for 34 days, or there abouts, they flooded my body with 14 L. of saline to flush out as much of the fecal fauna out of my body

the necrotizing of tissues caused repeated surgeries, 8 to be exact. That includes my appendix.

I woke several times during the 'big sleep', once in mid November when all of the fentenol had to be cleared off the shelf. It just so happens that fentenol is what they used to keep me under. If a drug is associated with 3 deaths, it is the bigg pharma's requirement to have all hospitals to destroy that batch. For three days they had me on a drip of Oxycontin. being in a coma under the effects of this drug has the potential of fragmenting one's moral core, as I was told by my brother. I passed a test of moral and ethical cohesion, then he tested me on my capability to calculate from memory the needs of an electrical job. At the time I did not realize what he was up to, but that sneak ol' critter had tested me then told me what he had done. I laughed at what he had done.

Over time I had to be taughtt to walk again and my left arm was non functional. At forst the docs and nurses had missed a stroke, but it was the result of another injury. I had to have my arm "re-awakened" with a TENS unit. Lots of pain there. It left welts. But I knew what it was for and my ultimate goal.

My memory was shot, my Strength was just gone, my balance was shot and my memory was so gorram scrambled I was not sure of where to go much less which to start.I spent 3 weeks [url=http://healthsouthruskrehab.com/] in a rehab clinic[/url where I was treated for much of what I needed to start. Those were some more of my heroes.

Those 9 weeks were like the first steps of a baby to the journey that is ongoing.

There were many return trips for a recurring infection, were if I had ignored just one of those times, I would not be here today to tell you of this.

Now it is late, I am hungry and my feet hurt from the 5 miles I walked to run my errands. But it is worth the pain as I got 4 gifts for Christmas taken care of. Now that I have a job, I get to give!

Oh man, that is awful. I'm so sorry you had to go through that.

**Kyrell1978** · 2018-12-15, 09:41 PM (ISO 8601)

We goin' ta keep dis year suthern thang goin' fer the whole thred? i tell you what.

**Insane Jeenyus** · 2018-12-15, 10:15 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by Tvtyrant

Oh man, that is awful. I'm so sorry you had to go through that.

as awful as it was, I really needed that wakeup call.

**Peelee** · 2018-12-15, 10:28 PM (ISO 8601)

Originally Posted by SZbNAhL

Nothing like a new thread in the morning*. You can tell it's Peelee made it because the title contains culinary referencec I had to look up.

Chivkem fried steak is somewhat akin to an American version of wienerschnitzel. Cheaper, but still tasty. Good Southern food. Plus, it gave way to the dumbest name for a tasty dish, chicken fried chicken.

Originally Posted by Insane Jeenyus

any kind of intestinal "mishap" such as, but not limited to, Sharp force trauma, GSW, diverticulitis or appendicitis

absolutely, positively needs
let me emphasize
ABSOLUTELY NEEDS
to be treated within 30 minutes for the best chance of survival

After the initial event, a victim has a 40% chance of survival, this drops by 6% every hour. The base number of 60% is only 30% for diabetics.

Septic shock is not something to be lackadaisical about!!!

This is scary stuff here. I hope it is understood by all about how serious I am here.

Not intestinal stuff, nor at risk of death. Still not something to be lackadaisical about, let me tell you. IIRC, I had a 5 hour window. And that's all I'm going to say about that, no more hints because I don't actually want it to be known.

ETA: on the other end of the spectrum, I have diverticulitis (well, currently diverticulosis. Stupid difference), and I don't think that should be on that list.

Originally Posted by Kyrell1978

We goin' ta keep dis year suthern thang goin' fer the whole thred? i tell you what.

It'll be a cold day in hell before I recognize Missurah!

Thread: Peelee's Chicken Fried Random Banter Thread #220

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